


Please stand by me

by Deancebra



Series: Please!verse [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alpha Castiel, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Beta Gabriel, Beta Sam, Cas is rich, Chick-Flick Moments, Daddy Issues, Dean Has Self-Worth Issues, Dean is better, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Light Angst, M/M, Mechanic Dean, Mental Health Issues, Mpreg, Omega Dean, Pregnant Dean, Relationship Discussions, Very fluffy, Worried Castiel, Worried Dean, mention of low self-esteem, mention of rape
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-24
Updated: 2017-06-08
Packaged: 2018-09-10 15:06:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 38,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8921809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Deancebra/pseuds/Deancebra
Summary: The sequel to "Please don't judge me"Dean has fought hard to get better and has mostly been succesful. But in the middle of being pregnant, looking for a new home and getting everything ready for their children, life happens. And life fucking sucks.Castiel tries to be everything he is supposed to as an alpha, but it is hard when is omega refuses to let him. Being with Dean is not always an easy task. At the same time he is forced to face issues that he thought he had worked through when his father asks to have part in his life again.





	1. Tiny hearts and hopes

Dean had reached his second trimester.  

Their first appointment with Donna had confirmed that Dean was indeed pregnant.   No big surprise, but it was fucking great to get it confirmed by a blood test.   Donna had actually hugged him and offered a congratulations so heartfelt that Dean cried. Goddamned hormones.   

That first week, Donna had Dean come in every other day to assure  his HCG levels raised.  The level more than doubled each time, so she was more than pleased. Knowing that Dean was prone to anxiety, Donna also scheduled him for an early ultrasound at 8 weeks.  Showing up on the screen was not only one tiny if-you-squint-it-looks-like-a-baby form, but two.  

“Well, that explains the fast raise of your HCG levels.” Donna grinned, showing them both of their babies, telling them a little about the development, and pointing out the heartbeats. “Are there any twins in your family?” She asked casually.  

And that was how Dean learned that Cas was a twin. Had been, he corrected himself. Had been. Jimmy had died young. It was the closest Dean had ever seen his alpha to breaking down in public. Donna looked mortified, but how could she have known? Dean had not.  

Later that evening in bed, lying in their usual positions, Dean’s ear listening to Cas’ steady heartbeat, he asked about Jimmy.  It had been a car crash . A drunk driver.   

Dean inhaled sharply, he had let a family get killed because he let his dad drive.  But before Dean could get caught up in his own thoughts, Cas was there.  Cupping his face and kissing him between sentences. 

“Not your fault Dean”, kiss.  “The only person to blame is the person who drove drunk”, kiss.  “I love you Dean”, kiss. 

When his kisses had the desired result, the omega’s scent no longer worried, his brow no longer stricken, Cas continued on.  He shared more about growing up with his twin, his happy memories.  Cas realized he was smiling.   

“I never talk about Jimmy because I only associated him with sadness.  How much suffering his death caused my family.  But it’s been so long and I feel ok.  Thank you for listening. I gather that this is a rather shitty way to learn about that..” 

“Your welcome my Alpha. Maybe…maybe one day, you can show me pictures of you and Jimmy as kids?” 

Cas kissed his omega once more.  “I would like that.” 

 

They also got the estimated due date, April 15th, with their ultrasound.   

Dean’s nausea had picked up, and instead of just being annoying as fuck he found himself throwing up on a regular basis. That part he hated. He liked breakfast, just not throwing it back up.  It never tasted as good going that way.  

His scent changed around week 10.  Cas noticed it first and scenting Dean seemed to become his new hobby.  His would cuddle up be against Dean, nose against his neck and gently caressing his still flat stomach. When Dean asked him what was going on, he just got a content growl in return, alpha telling him to shut the fuck up and enjoy just being together.  

… 

Dean growled frustrated, head inside his closet.  

“I don’t have any more clean sweats.” He explained when he felt sharp alpha eyes on his back. He was unable to close his jeans, which annoyed him a great deal. He was not showing very much, just enough for people to be wondering if he was pregnant or just had a beer or two too many. But his pants where a clear sign that they were growing in there. Gently he stroke his stomach, a habit he had picked up quickly, giving the closet another stare.  

“You can take some of mine, but then we are also going shopping tomorrow.” Cas suggested. He had tried to get Dean shopping for a while without much luck. The omega had not seen the point when he had not needed waiting-clothes, but it was about time.  

“Fine.” The green eyed man growled, turning to his alphas closet to get a pair of just-too-short sweats to wear for the day.  

So, anyway, starting second trimester meant another scan. It would be too early to tell gender (they had not decided on if they wanted to know either, still debating for and against), but it was time for nuchal scan. Donna would also make sure that everything went smoothly, that they grew right and such. And they would get scan-pictures with them home to show off to the family! And they would most likely be able to hear the heartbeat of their babies too, it had still been too early for that at 8th week, though it had been overwhelming just seeing the small blinks of hearts on the screen. Dean had possibly shed a few  very manly tears.  

Dean had kept away from everyone as far as possible (the guys at work knew, but only because they had to do the jobs with poisonous fumes for him) because he wanted to know that everything was good before telling. And he would know after that scan. There would be another scan later on for anomalies bust most chose to tell after 12thhe knew. Waiting twins also meant that he would start showing early, making it hard to conceal his pregnancy longer than that.  

So they had invited Charlie, Sam, Jess and Gabe for lunch Sunday. If everything went smoothly with the scan they had gotten them gifts (“best uncle due in April 2017” shirts for Sam and Gabriel, “Awesome aunt, needed for April 2017” for Charlie and Jessica. Also two for Bobby as Dean was not knowing if he should have the uncle or granddad version, and a debated on whether or not Jody should have an auntie-shirt. They decided on getting her one.) together with the ultrasound pictures. If something should turn out to be wrong, they had decided on telling them, knowing that the support and understanding would be very needed. 

Dean had debated a lot with himself in regard to that lunch too. Should he invite Bobby and give him the “best granddad ever!” shirt he had been eyeing, or would it be too much? Bobby had been more of a father figure for Dean that his dad had ever been, and he had pretty much been working in the garage since he turned 18, but that did not mean that the older man had similar warm feelings towards him. Well, he had time to make up his mind.

  

Dean found himself puking his guts out after putting on the sweats. He was nervous and edgy, wanting everything to be fine and still fearing that it was not. Because when had fate last been on his site? Sure enough, it was quarter past ten.  

Cas gently handed him a glass with ginger, lime and apple-juice that seemed to take the top of the nausea on the bad days. Taking a deep breath through his nose let him know, that his alpha was feeling just as bad as he was. Dean leaned into him, letting the embrace linger for long enough that Castiel’s scent changed as he little by little calmed down. Apparently the smell of pregnant mate had that effect on alphas, soothing and satisfying something deep and animalistic in them.  

“Should we get going?” Dean asked, nuzzling against Cass neck.  

“Mhm. We should, if we want to make it to the appointment in time.” Cas sighed, looking slightly conflicted about going in the first place.  

“Scent me.” He barred his neck, taking the hand of the small of his back to cup it up around the slight swell of his stomach. “They are fine Cas. You can smell that, right? Smell how they are developing in here, how nice they have it. You don’t have to worry. The scan will just show that I am right, you know? And that you are one sappy worried excuse for an alpha.”  

Cas made a non-committal agreeing sound, and Dean let him linger a little longer, just because he enjoyed it as much as the alpha did.  

They detangled and got out into the car, Dean in the passenger seat wearing one of the newly installed seatbelts. He had gotten one of the guys from work to help him with that as soon as he had gotten the pregnancy confirmed. The drive was not exactly long or particular interesting, and both men found themselves lost in thought as they drove.  

Donna got them in the waiting room just a moment after they had seated themselves, her face one big smile. 

“Are you guys ready?”  

“As ready as we will ever be.” Cas tried on smiling, but he was not really doing that very well. It looked rather sad. Dean squeezed his hand, trying to let him know that he was there all the way.  

Dean handed his tee to Cas before getting on the raised bed, just like the last time. Donna gently squeezed the cold gel onto his stomach before pressing the ultrasound to his skin. She did not need to look very long before finding the twins.  

“See guys?” She pointed at the screen. “They seem to have developed perfectly fine, both of them, but we will know for sure in just a moment when I have taken the measurements.”  

Dean swallowed, closing his eyes for a moment in overwhelming relief. He could smell the same coming in doses to his right where Cas was holding his hand.  

She did not ask if they wanted to hear the heartbeats, simply turned on something and then the room was filled with the rapid beatings of their children’s hearts. If he listened closely, Dean could have sworn that he could sense his own interfering with theirs, protecting and caring for them somehow.  

Words failed him. He looked up, just to see his alpha crying silent tears a wide smile plastered to his face. Dean could only remember one time were he had seen Cas that happy, and that had been when he had accepted his proposal.  

Donna seemed satisfied as well, telling them that their babies indeed followed the curves and handing them the printed versions of the scans, showing the two tiny babies in grainy grey, white and black.  

  

Saturday they went shopping for some clothes that Dean would actually be able to be in. They managed to find jeans with stretchy panels and some with elastic, meaning that he would be able to use them for quite a while. On top of that they got more t-shirts, extra sweatpants and a nice bottom down shirt for more formal occasions. Dean had no clue why he needed that, but Cas insisted that he did. Because they were out anyway they got Cas some clothes as well, and after lunch they somehow found themselves in front of a store with baby equipment.  

“You know… there would be no harm in looking..?” Dean suggested, pretty much dragging Castiel in there. The alpha had been completely caught by the sight of a pair of tiny indoor shoes, and while the green eyed omega had to admit that they were cute as hell, he also knew that babies needed a lot other stuff before they would need tiny shoes. Heck, it would take months or something before they could do anything resembling walking.  

“Can I help you guys?” A sweet looking omega girl stood in front of them, a wide smile on her face.  

“Uh.” Cas replied, dump struck and apparently unable to make a sentence making sense. Those tiny shoes had hit him hard.  

“We are expecting twins in late April. And honestly, we are a little lost on what are needed and what are just nice to have.” Dean answered, smiling towards the girl.  

“Oh, congratulations!” the girl exclaimed, looking happy on their behalf. “Well, do you have anything or are we starting from scratch?”  

They left the store with orders on costume made cribs (Cas had insisted), a selection of basic clothing’s in gender-neutral colours, order on a twin stroller, changing table and a lot of other stuff… and some of the tiny shoes that Cas had not been able to leave without either, like having tiny shoes for their kids somehow made it easier to understand that they were going to be alright.  

“We need a bigger home before they arrive. I know that we could make it work while they are small, but getting up and down to street-level with the stroller without an elevator?” Dean sighed, knowing his alpha was right. That did not make it easy to think about giving up his home though.  

“We need a garden.” Dean countered. “Because I want my kids to have a yard to play on and swings. And a place for barbeques.”  

Cas send him another bright smile. 


	2. Announcements

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean and Cas has something to tell their make-shift family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When my beta returned this edited version to me, I started considering if one could die from fluffyness. It was a close call for me. 
> 
> Have a happy new year, I am wishing all the best for you guys <3

That Sunday morning, Dean washed with the dull beta body wash and wore beta deodorant for the first time in over a year.  He wanted to conceal his pregnancy changed scent until Cas had given their family members their shirts and they had formally announced that their little family would be double in size by spring.  He was not sure if his scent had changed enough for his family to notice, but he was not going to risk it if it had. So far only Cas had been able to “sniff him out” but it would not be that way for long. His rapidly growing belly would also be a dead giveaway.   

Sam was first, no surprise, to arrive for lunch.  He looked confused as he hugged Dean, recognizing the beta deodorant Dean used to cover his natural omega scent and protect himself from unwanted alpha knot-head advances.   Dean had stopped using it after he and Cas had become a thing, so he was sure Sam was concerned that he was suddenly wearing it again.  Dean could almost see how Sam's brain wrapped around that little piece of info, trying to figure it out without asking Dean outright.  With Sam came Jessica, just a moment behind because her boots had taken a little more time to get off and leave in the small entrance hallway than Sam’s.  She too looked utterly confused by his scent. Dean just smiled like nothing had changed, leaving them in the living room to puzzle it out.  

Dean returned to Cas helping him place the last of the food on the dining room table, leaving space for the cake brought by Gabriel, who had arrived shortly after Sam and Jess.   Jody had been surprised when Dean had extended the family luncheon invitation to her as well, but had never the less accepted, sounding happy to be invited.  Jody had been a great support to Dean during and after the Alistair-affair, so he and Cas now considered her a close friend.   Dean often had coffee with both Jody and Charlie, who arrived shortly after Jody did.  The women greeting each other with a hug before Charlie re-introduced Jody to the rest of the group.  Dean smelled the hints of motor oil and grease before he registered that Bobby had arrived as well.   

“So, how is the mustang-project working out Dean?” Sam asked as everyone sat in the living room with drinks and small plates of food.  He had been the first person Dean had called (in tears, stupid hormones) to tell about Bobby asking him to help restore it.  Sam knew Bobby's story and how much the mustang restoration meant to him.  He also knew why Bobby had asked Dean to help him even if Dean had trouble believing how much Bobby valued him.   

“Moving slowly forward.  Some of the parts are nearly impossible to get original, but Bobby and I want as much as possible of her to be original, no matter how difficult it is or how long we have to wait. There may be some parts I can't get, but I will cross that bridge when I come to it.” He replied, as he fished out his phone to show off a few pictures not highlighted on his blog.  Dean knew his guests all followed the online blog he created to show the steps of the restoration project, so he appreciated their interest.  In his enthusiasm, he did not notice Bobby's proud smile.     

“You know Dean, you could also throw in some videos on the blog?” Charlie pointed out.  

“Once the motor is fixed, I bet your online followers would love to hear her roar.  Before that though, maybe you could also do some how-to videos like on oil changes or rustproofing or maybe even video the steps you take to find a part.   I know it's more difficult to film, but I also believe that a lot of fans would appreciate that.  Sort of making your own restoration documentary?”  

Bobby grumbled something that could be an agreeing sound. Dean assumed it was and made plans to meet Charlie and discuss a filming plan moving forward.  Knowing that he could talk for hours about the mustang restoration, Dean quickly changed the subject to invite conversation among his guests.  

“How are your nursing classes going Jessica?” Dean asked with a smile. 

“Everything is going well.” She replied, then continued, “The topics last year were pretty easy and if I had to admit slightly boring. This semester though is when the real nursing classes start.  We actually will start seeing patients soon.  Sam sometimes complains that I am always studying or thinking about school, no matter what we may be doing.” She grinned, looking a bit guilty. "But I just want to be the best nurse that I possibly can be."   

"I am sure you will be a great nurse Jessica" Dean replied, as Sam placed his arm around Jessica, kissing her temple as he murmured agreement.  Sam might complain, but everyone could tell he was proud.  Especially after he proceeded to tell the room how Jessica had earned straight A's the previous semester and had been invited to intern at the student health center over the summer.   As conversation continued about Jessica's studies, Dean could not help but interject about Sam's scholarly achievements as well.  Dean sometimes thought Sam came out of the womb with his face in a book studying.  But his hard work was paying off as it looked that he was well on his way to being accepted into law school with a full scholarship.   

Through out lunch, Jody followed conversations with interest, though she did not really say much. Her alpha-scent was content, though a little nervous, but overall had the same calming effect on Dean that Castiel’s had.  

While he and Cas cleared the plates from lunch, Dean overheard Sam thanking Jody for bringing Alistair to justice.  He smiled to himself as he heard Jody try to give credit to others as well. But for Dean, if Jody had not been the one to take his statement, if she had been anything like the judgemental police officer that questioned him in the hospital, he was not sure he would have been able to talk so openly or provide the detailed information that led to Allister's arrest.   During and after the trial, she had also become a true friend, keeping Dean informed, allowing him to vent his frustrations, or simply meeting up for coffee to talk.   

Dean caught Jody's eyes over the shoulder of his gargantuan brother, who was now giving her a hug.  He smiled softly at her, hoping that the look he conveyed somehow communicated how much she meant to him.   She smiled back and nodded.   

 "Dean-o it's time for cake!"  Gabriel interrupted, breaking off Dean and Jody's stare as Sam let go of her. "Sam stop hugging all the gorgeous single women and grab some paper plates!  Bobby, grab a knife and start cutting slices.  Be generous!  No skimping on the cake!"  

After they all had a slice and were once again in the living room (and after Gabe gave them all an impassioned speech about the trials and tribulations of selecting and baking the perfect cake), Gabe turned his attention back to Dean.  

“So, bro-in-law, what is up with the shitty beta wash and deo? You smell freaking weird and I like your real smell better.” Gabe stated, the rest of their guests nodding in agreement.   

Dean and Cas grinned at each other, adding to everyone's confusion.  

“Wait here.” Cas ordered then left for their bedroom.  When he returned he had six, nicely wrapped gift boxes in his hands.     

“We have gotten each of you a gift.  It is very important that you open them at the same though.” The dark-haired alpha explained as he handed the gifts out to everyone.  

“Three, two, one, open!”  

For a short moment the only sound in the room was gift paper being ripped open.  But then Jessica gave an excited squeal.  Everyone else stopped opening their packages just to stare at her, but she refused to show them her gift, holding it close to her body and smiling big.   

Shortly after everyone else was staring at their own individual t-shirt.  Gabriel was one big smile, Jessica looked on the verge of crying from sheer happiness on their behalf.  

“Aunt?” Charlie slowly asked, looking like she had no idea what to do with that title.  

“Yeah. You are family too.” Dean told her, causing her to look away for a moment as she got a hold of herself.  He gave Jody a wide smile, letting her know that the family title extended to her as well. 

“I am honoured.” The dark-haired sheriff told them, a gentle smile on her lips.  Dean knew she was given a t-shirt that said aunt, but Dean from the beginning had responded favourably to her caring, maternal manner.  He thought she was like his mom or at least what he had always hoped his mother would be like if she had lived.    

Sam however, higher education and all, did not understand the implications of his gift.  

“Uncle?” He showed Dean the front of his shirt. “I am not an uncle..?”  

“Try reading he fine print.” Dean rolled his eyes.  To everyone's t-shirt pocket in small print had been added the words, "Established April 2017."   

Sam turned the tee around and around, reading the "best uncle" and "established..." lines several times, before turning his eyes to Dean.  

“Does this mean…?” he asked, trying to get a confirmation without asking directly.  

“That I have not just eaten one too many burgers? Yeah.  I'm not getting fat Sam, I'm pregnant.” Dean teased as his younger brother engulfed him in full body hug, picking Dean up and twirling (freaking twirling!) him in a circle.   

"Alright you big moose let me go!" Dean laughed, feet returning to the ground.  Sam now turned his attention to Cas, who got the same treatment.   

Having seen almost everyone’s reaction, Dean slowly turned his attention to finding Bobby, who he realized was no longer in the living room.   Dean's heart fell into his stomach and his scent became bitter with disappointment.  Apparently, he had made a mistake.  Motioning to Cas that he was heading to the kitchen, he left his mate to entertain and distract their guests while he went to apologize to the older beta.     

After much deliberation, Dean had finally decided which t-shirt to give Bobby.  Cas had simply kissed him and whispered, "right choice" before taking the shirt from his hands in order to wrap it.  Dean's indecision came from his worry that Bobby did not care for him the way Dean cared for Bobby.   

The beta had always supported him and praised him and had treated him as an equal, not caring about his secondary gender.  He always gave Dean the same opportunities as his alpha and beta employees.  Even after occasional drunken visits to the garage from John, who made sure to let Bobby know about Dean's rape and his worthlessness, Bobby never treated him any differently.  He even interceded at times by calming John down and driving him home to sober up.   And Dean had thrived under Bobby's mentorship.  Even during his depression, work had always been a source of happiness and pride for Dean.  It was Bobby who had coaxed him into actually taking the official certificate and then a master in mechanics. The omega had never in his life thought he was smart enough, but Bobby had made him see otherwise.  Bobby had always been a better father figure to Dean than John had ever been. 

Hell, who was he kidding?  Dean loved Bobby and considered Bobby his father.  After Bobby asked him to help restore the mustang, he was hoping Bobby felt the same.   Apparently though, Dean was wrong.    

What Dean had not expected when he reached the kitchen was Bobby sobbing silently, clutching his t-shirt to his chest.  His face looked so stricken that it almost physically hurt the omega's heart.   

Bobby took a few deep breaths and stood up straight, looking Dean in the eyes as he spoke. “I had never thought I would have children or grandchildren.  I had buried that dream with my wife and unborn child.  And then you walked into my garage all bluster and attitude and asked for a job.  Ya know, Rufus called me crazy when I hired you.  But it was the best decision I ever made.  I love you like a son Dean and I would be proud if your pups called me Grandpa.”  

Oh.  Wait.  Dean could only blink as his overwhelmed brain fought to catch up to this change in situation and beat back the negative voice that had already started telling him that Bobby had rejected him.   

Bobby loved him.  Considered Dean his son.  His pups were going to grow up with a loving grandpa.  One that would spoil them, and care for them, and teach them how to change a tire.  His children would never be told they were worthless, or stupid, or a faggot.  They would never be hit.  Or would worry how they would pay for food or where they were going to live.  Dean's children were going to be surrounded by a family who would love them unconditionally, no matter what they presented as.   

As Dean regained his presence of mind, he realized he was being hugged between Bobby and Cas, the beta at his front while Cas embraced him from the back.  His alpha must have smelled all the changes in his scent even with the beta deodorant and been worried.     

Dean snaked his arms around Bobby's waist and hugged him back, even though it was awkward with Cas velcroed to his back.   But the omega was not going to complain, he was too happy.  His scent once again changing to fit his mood.   

“You will be the best Grandpa ever.” Dean whispered into Bobby's ear before letting him go, leaning back into the arms of his alpha.   

“You have been a great dad to me, anyway.  So… Yeah. I am really glad that you want to be part of our children's lives Bobby.  You know how our dad was,” He nodded towards the living room where Sam still sat, “and honestly, I do not want my kids brought up around the same bullshit that we were.” 

Bobby smiled and pulled his t-shirt over his head, putting it on.  It fit a little snug over his button up shirt, but Bobby was happy and proud and that was all that mattered.  "Come on boys, I think you still have some news to tell." Bobby winked as he walked back to the living room, Cas and Dean following hand and hand behind him.   

“So do you know the gender?” Charlie asked when they reached the room ignoring the fact they had been absent at all. “I would love to buy some cosplay for your kid.” 

“Genders. Kids.” Dean corrected with a smug smile, leaving the room stunned for a moment.  

“So you are saying that there are two puppies in there?” She pointed  incredulously to his stomach.  

“Yup.  Too soon to know the genders yet though.” The green eyed omega smiled wide, fishing out the framed ultrasound of their babies from the side table when it had been hidden. Cooing sounds followed the picture from hand to hand around the living room.  

“So we have also decided to look for a bigger place.” Cas stated. “We could possibly fit one baby in here, but two? And then there is no elevator, meaning that we would have to carry the stroller up and down. Not that I know very much about it, but I suppose that one is tired enough with small children without needing to carry a stroller up and down the stairs.” 

“Oh. I can ask around?” Gabriel suggested. “You guys would not believe the amount of things people tell me when I sell them baked goods.” 

“I actually do.” Charlie chirped in, causing Cas to laugh out loud.  "I'll keep my ears open too!"  Everyone else nodded in agreement and started discussing the list of things the new house would require to house their family.  The conversation continued on as Dean sat down on the couch beside Jessica, Cas sitting on the floor between his legs.  He began rubbing Dean's ankles and feet automatically making the ladies of the group let out a collective awwwwwww sound.   The afternoon continued to pass pleasantly, Bobby, Jody and Charlie leaving amid more hugs and congratulations, while Sam, Jessica and Gabriel got up to clean the dishes, already discussing what pizza to order for dinner.  

Dean took a moment to escape to their small balcony under the guise of getting some fresh air.  Honestly, he was still trying to process all that had happened.  His beta body wash had worn off and he had washed off the deodorant after the first round of guests left.  He was glad he smelled like himself again.  He smelled like mated, pregnant omega.   He loved his scent.   Why had he been ashamed of his true self for so long?   

Sam joined him on the balcony, almost filling it entirely.  They stood side by side, shoulders touching, looking out onto the complex's shared garden area.   

“So. Pregnant..?” 

“Yeah.”  

Sam sighed softly, before he spoke again. “You know Dean, when we found you after you had been kidnapped, there were times I doubted that you would survive.  But you did survive, but then things got so bad.  Even worse then before.  So then I worried if you would actually  _live_.  Especially after everything with Dad, you know?  I was glad you left home, but he still had so much control over you even after he died.  I didn't know if you would ever allow yourself to be happy.  To live without fear and shame.” 

Dean turned his eyes towards his younger brother, wondering where he was going with his speech. Sam continued to stare out into the horizon and continued.  

“I was so ready to kill Cas when he told me that he was in love with you.  You know that I was friends with him for almost a year before you got to meet him?  I was so afraid to introduce you two.  Afraid that he would turn into a classic knot-head if he met you.  That he would push you into something that you were not ready for, that he would hurt you.  But I was also afraid that you would never allow yourself to get close to him.  That you would break his heart.  Should have given you guys more credit I guess.”  

Sam was running his hand through his hair, looking a little awkward now.  He finally turned towards his older brother, placing his hands on Dean's shoulders and looking directly into his eyes. 

“I am just so glad that you are happy Dean.  That you are getting everything in life that you deserve.  Because you deserve happiness and you have worked so hard for it.  Have I ever thanked you for keeping me safe Dean?  Because I really, really need you to know how thankful I am for you.  How you protected me from dad, took care of me, and made sure I got a good education.  I love you Dean.  And I know that you are going to be a great dad.  Hell, I know it better than anyone."  

“You really think so?” Dean sounded hoarse.  He felt his tears before he could even register he was crying (again! Damn hormones).  He just felt so moved and overwhelmed by his emotions.   

“I know so Dean.”  

“Thank you.” He whispered, knees buckling, letting Sam catch him and hug him close.  After a few moments in Sam's embrace, Dean gave him one last squeeze and straightened back up.  He wiped his face and took a few deep breaths, wanting to regain his composure before going back into their apartment.   

Hesitantly, his brother asked if he could touch his stomach. Dean laughed, lifting his shirt up off his stomach to let him stroke it.  There was a small, round bump, not very impressive, not yet anyway.  

“We got to hear their heartbeats Sammy. I… It was so overwhelming you know? Those were the heart beats of the two tiny humans growing inside of me.  You know they already have fingers and toes?  Fingerprints too.” 

Sam just hugged him again, tighter this time.  Dean melted into the embrace, allowing himself to enjoy the closeness with his baby brother.  His first pup really.    

Walking back into their living room, Dean saw Cas and Gabe sitting close on the couch.  He could tell from his alpha's posture that they had also had a conversation similar to the one that Dean and Sam just had.    

Jessica's voice calling from the kitchen asking Sam for help in making a salad interrupted the silence.  Raising from the couch, Cas met Dean halfway and enveloped Dean in a hug, their noses each buried in the other's neck to scent.  Dean could smell sadness, fear, love and hope in Castiel’s scent. Dean understood and figured his scent was a similar mix of emotions. 

   

The rest of the night was uneventful.  Pizza was eaten in front of the television while Gabe and Dean explained the plot intricacies of Dr. Sexy to the others.    

As they slept that night, alpha and omega spooned against each other, hands of both men covered the swell of Dean's abdomen instinctively.  In the dark it was difficult to tell where one man ended and the other began.   


	3. Hunting houses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas and Dean looks out for a house, but is house hunting really as easy as it seems?

  As Dean moved into his second trimester of pregnancy, his nausea seemed to finally ease up.  Other than his caffeine and alcohol intake being restricted, as in he could have none, he was feeling pretty good.  His stomach seemed to be growing by the day and he had more than once been stopped by strangers who offered congratulations or simply smiled and cooed.   Dean realized that his overwhelming urge to preen over a pregnant person before he got pregnant was not just specific to his gender.  Apparently, it was a pretty universal feeling.  It just was so much nicer to be on the receiving end of the attention.  To be the pregnant omega, not the omega worrying about getting pregnant.  

The only thing that really seemed to be causing him any tension was the house hunting.  As promised their family kept on the look out for prospective rentals; Gabe sending them almost daily emails. Dean and Cas also searched online and in the newspaper, trying to get a clearer picture of what they wanted versus what they could afford. Dean was very opposed to a bank loan because he prided himself on paying his debts.  He also heard stories about how omegas were turned down for loans simply due to the misconception that were unable to hold a job.  He refused to be put through the loan process just so he could be turned down or be told his alpha needed to be the primary loan holder.    

When Dean expressed his reasons for renting instead of buying, Cas had looked at him as if considering a reply, but simply shrugged and continued to scroll through the rental listings.  Unfortunately,  they found that a lot of rentals looked great online, but were dumps in person or they were out of Dean's set price range.   They also discovered that many landlords were not willing to make changes or updates and most were not willing to give them a break on the price if they did renovations themselves.  It had been fucking frustrating, and Dean was starting to feel like there would never be a house for their growing family.  Over a month had passed like that.   

  

“I have been thinking…” Cas started one Sunday afternoon at home, sipping his coffee while Dean drank his decaf.  

“That sounds dangerous.”   

Cas continued like he had not heard Dean's comment.   

“Maybe we should not rent a house, but buy one instead? That way we can get what we want and not have to get permission if we want to make changes.”   

“We can’t afford that Cas.” Dean sighed, feeling like they had been over that topic before.   

“That is not true.  You can’t afford it on your own, but we are together.  And I have the money to buy a house outright without getting a loan.  Why won't you even discuss letting me buy a house for us? For our _family?_ The alpha leaned back, arms crossed. He looked pensive.   

“I don’t want to be the hopeless omega who needs an alpha to buy a house, no thank you.” Dean hissed, annoyed. “It is bad enough that I am knocked up like a whore, do you think I will let you pay me like one?”  

“First of all, the carrier of my children is not a whore.  And secondly, I want to buy us a house to make sure we can raise our children in a safe, loving place.  It has nothing to do with buying you!” Cas argued.   

Dean rationally understood that Cas was right, but emotionally he _hated_ the thought of Cas buying them a house.  Dean hated the fact that it made him feel helpless, like he had become the stereotypical omega.  Like he was becoming every worthless thing John claimed he would become when he presented.  He had already bent over for his alpha.  He had gotten knocked up.  At least he was still working and not barefoot and pregnant, but dammit, that was not the point.   

“I don’t like the idea of you paying for me. I can earn my own money, thank you very much.”  

“I am not paying for you Dean. I am merely providing for my family, making sure that you guys have somewhere safe! Why can’t you let me do that for you? Hell, why are you refusing to let me take care of you in any way?” Cas sounded angry.   

“Because I am not weak. I can take care of myself and my family!” He growled back, getting up from the sofa. He was angry enough to feel the tears prickle in his eyes, but hell if he would let Cas see him cry over a fucking house discussion.     

“I never said you were weak!”   

“I don’t give a shit about what you say.  You do not get to control me!  It's my decision.  You can not buy a house for me or my pups, end of discussion!” Dean was close to yelling.  He had shut down this discussion so many times before and Cas had let it go.  Why was Cas not listening?  

He could see how Cas almost vibrated with the need to say more, to argue.  The alpha barely managed to keep it together, jaw and shoulders tight, hands clenched into fists.    

“I am going for a walk.” Dean snarled, not waiting for the alpha to respond.  Dean knew the signs of pissed off alpha, could smell it too.  He would be damned if he let Cas yell at him.  To try take away his independence and control his life like John had tried to do.    

  

Dean walked aimlessly, but soon found himself outside Cas' coffee shop.  Charlie's red hair guiding him inside like a beacon.  He had grown so fond over the other omega since Cas had introduced them and often found himself talking to her or asking for advice. Just knowing that she was close seemed to ease some of the tension he had. 

Charlie looked up at him when he came through the door, her welcoming smile faltering as he came closer.  She could sniff out his distress.   

“I will fix you a cup of decaf salted caramel, alright?” She patted him on the shoulder for a moment, before drawing him into a close hug.  

“Thank you, Charlie.” He answered, sitting down in his favorite spot.   

When she returned with the coffee, she looked mildly guilty.   

"I take it you texted Cas that I was here?" Dean asked.  Charlie simply nodded.      

“He was worried Dean.  You were so angry and he did not want anything bad to happen to you or your pups."  

Dean ducked his head low.  "I...I just needed to get away Charlie.  He wasn't listening to me, not really.  And I had to get away before I said or did something I'd regret."   

"So do you want to talk about it with me?  I'm an omega, maybe I can understand a bit better than Cas can."  Charlie sat down in the seat across from him, leaving the shop counter to one of their student helpers. Charlie was close enough to respond if help was needed, but otherwise was able to give Dean her full attention.    

"Cas wants to buy me a house.  It seems like a stupid thing to get angry over," Dean admitted, “but I just…you know how my dad would treat me if he knew I was the typical omega, right?  Mated, pregnant?  He would call me worthless.  Weak.   A bitch to be owned.  He always said that the only thing an omega is good for is pleasing an alpha, to bend over and take a knot.  Goddamit, I agreed with him more than once when I thought I was going to present an alpha...     
And I know that he was wrong because I know that I am more than that and that Cas loves me.  God, he has already given me so much, done so much for me and I just… I can’t wrap my head about letting him give more without something shifting in our relationship.   So when Cas talks about buying a house for me, if feels like I am becoming what John said I would.  And it scares me to have to rely on another person to take care of me and my babies.  I am not weak and I don't need to be taken care of just because I am an omega."  

“You are definitely not weak, Dean.” Charlie grabbed his hand over the table, gently squeezing it, as if to accentuate her point. “You are quite the opposite. I know a lot of people who have been through a fraction of what you have and are unable to function much less have a happy life.  You have fought to get better, you have found love and have a family on the way.  That is not weakness Dean, that is strength."  

Before he managed to protest, Charlie continued:   

“And while nobody who knows you would doubt for a second that you could build a house for you and your pups from scratch, Cas wants to provide for his family as well.  I think that you sometimes make him feel like he is a little redundant.  You have a good job and pay your own bills.  You take care of the home, do the laundry, and are an excellent cook.  You are the one people go to if they need help or advice.  You pay for Sam's college bills.  You keep the cars running and do all the basic house repairs.  What does that leave Cas to do in this relationship?"  

She smiled wryly towards him.   

“And I get that it's not easy, letting someone else take care of you.  Especially, when you are so used to taking care of yourself and everyone else.  But for Cas, buying a house is not about controlling you or making you reliant on him.  It's simply a way he can provide for his family.  So please consider it, if not for yourself, then for your pups.  The pups that are not just yours to take care of, but yours and Cas'"  

Dean caressed his stomach, weighing Charlie's words.  The house wasn't just for him.  

"Besides," Charlie continued, trying to lighten the mood.  "I don't want to deal with a sad, mopey Cas tomorrow.  Just think how happy it would make your alpha if you would at least discuss letting him contribute more.  Just because he's not an omega, doesn't mean he does not have the same desire to provide for his family.  It doesn't mean that he thinks you can’t do it yourself, it just would make him so happy to help."  

Dean considered. “I still don’t like it Charlie.”   

“I didn't ask you to like it, just to think about it.”   

“Fine. I will.” Dean agreed, pouting like a child until she suggested pie.   

She stayed with him as he ate, talking about nothing and everything.  Dean could feel his anger dissipating, replaced by a general sense of contentment.  The pie was delicious, the company even better. Two years ago he did not have this, this friendly sanctuary.  He would have simply let his anger fester and look for help at the bottom of a bottle.  He was so glad his life was different.  So different, he thought, smiling as he rubbed his belly again.  

By the time he was ready to leave, Charlie had even convinced him to attend a LARP event, promising him how it was a great family activity and accepting of all people and genders.  He wasn't sure it would be all that, but the idea of role playing with Cas did get him excited. If nothing else they could bring it into the bedroom, which he also pointed out to Charlie while wiggeling his eyebrows like a madman. She swatted his arm while laughing.    

Dean was feeling a little better when he walked home. He decided to ask Benny for advice as well, calling and leaving a message on his service.   Not expecting an immediate call back since it was not an emergency, Dean was surprised to get a call when he was nearly home.   

Sitting down on the front step to their apartment complex, Dean answered the call.   

 _“Good afternoon Dean. You called?”_   

“I have something I wanted to talk with you about…” The omega started, sighing.   

“ _Go ahead.”_   

“So, you know that I am pregnant.” Dean started.  He had told Benny about getting pregnant, but had not seen him in quite a while.  They had agreed Dean was well and stable enough to take a break from counseling just as long as he agreed to reach out if any issues came up.    

 _“Yes, everything is going well I hope?”_ Benny sounded happy.   

“Yup, everything is going great.  The pups are growing by the minute and Donna said everything is progressing normally.  So, anyway, that is sort of what this call is about.   Since we are expecting twins… meaning two of everything, you know?  My apartment is simply too small. So Cas and I have been looking at houses for rent, because we really want more room, and maybe more bathrooms too because what if both pups are girls and occupy them all the time when they are teens?  Well heck, what if I have two Sammy's?  He spent more time in the bathroom fixing his hair than any girl probably does.”   

Dean stopped and took a deep, calming breath.  He realized he was rambling and avoiding the reason for his phone call.    

“So anyway, you know that Cas insisted on paying for my therapy, right?  The sessions that my stupid insurance would not pay for?” When Benny had made an agreeing sound, Dean continued: “And I let him pay because I needed the help.  But now, he wants to buy me a fucking house, Benny.  A house!  And I have no clue what to do.”  

 _“Why is that a bad thing?”_   

“Because it makes me feel like a weak ass omega. Like I cannot take care of myself or my family. That I need an alpha to do that for me.”  

 _“Both of us know that it is not the truth. Why do you feel like that?”_   

“Because I got better Benny.  That I am better and don't need the help anymore.  Just because I am the typical omega who got knocked up by an alpha does not mean I am a worthless bitch."  

 _"Woah Dean, that sounds like John's words not yours."_   

"Well, my dad used to tell me that it was the man's responsibility to provide for his family.  He expected me to find myself a sweet girl, settle down, and get _her_ pregnant, you know?” Dean sighed. “I know it sounds like a pathetic and lame ass excuse, but I just feel like I have let down my old man so much by just being with Cas, and that this would just be too much. I know I owe him nothing Benny, but I still feel like he would be so fucking disappointed in me.”  

“I am just... I… I don’t want people to see the stereotypical omega when looking at me. And I feel like we are pretty close to that. Having my own apartment sort of helps, because if people should make a comment about me just using my alpha or whatever, I can tell them that I am the only one on the lease and actually pay for the rent myself. But with Cas buying a house? I could not do that. I don’t want to be bought Benny.”  

The therapist was quiet for a moment before he started to talk again.   

 _“Your feelings are very valid, as are your concerns Dean. There are people who would see you that way, but are their opinions really worth making yourself and_ _Castiel_ _unhappy about?”_   

“I suppose not…”  

 _“… I can't imagine that any of these_ _judgemental_ _people would be people you would want in your life or your pups lives anyway.”_ Benny continued.  

 _“Would your loved ones see you as weaker? Worthless?  Owned?”_   

“Doubt that…” Dean found himself saying.  

 _“I don’t say that you should immediately agree with Cas and tell him that you are cool with him buying a house, but I do think that you should consider it an option.  You definitely both need to be on the housing deed as equal partners.  But as for paying for the house, you guys could get a bank loan together if that makes you feel better? Or write up some type of contract regarding mortgage payments or utilities so you are able to equally contribute to housing expenses as well.  Or what if you bought a fixer upper and you paid back your share by doing the renovations yourself?  There are many options Dean, you just need to talk about it."_   

Dean simply hummed in response, considering Benny's words.   

 _"Besides by making this type of decision without discussing it with your partner, aren't you acting like the controlling knot-head you assume Cas is trying to be?”_   

“I had not thought about it like that.” He admitted, drawing a hand through his short hair. Cas would probably be happy to compromise if Dean agreed to at least talk about it.  And maybe he would eventually be alright with his alpha paying out the loan or taking over expenses.  Especially if they had more kids.  They should talk about it any way.   

“Thanks Benny.  I'm not sure what will happen, but I do promise I will talk about it with Cas.”   

 _“That's all I'm asking Dean.  Take care of yourself.  And remember you can always call if you need to talk, alright?”_   

“Yeah.” The omega agreed before hanging up the phone. He slowly stretched before getting up from the steps. He was not looking forward to getting bigger, because already he felt ungraceful and uneven, like he could tip forward if any more weight was added to his front. But the fact the pups were growing did make him happy and he figured he would deal with being the size of a beached whale.   

As soon as he opened the apartment door, he found his arms full of alpha, who smelled of worry, sorrow, confusion and anger.   

Cas held him close for a moment, breathing unevenly into Dean's collarbone. Sensing that his mate was upset for reasons other than their fight, Dean held him close, letting him take all the comfort he needed.   

Cas finally stepped back to look at Dean, panic in his blue eyes.    

“My dad called. He wants to meet you. Wants to be a part of our life.  Our pups’ life.”   

 

  

 

 

 


	4. Daddy dearest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel has no idea what to do, knowing that his father wants to be a part of his life again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your support guys. I don't think you as readers know exactly how much kudos or comments means to me as a writer, but it really is everything 
> 
> I also need to send out another thank you to my wonderful beta-reader. She is doing so much work with my raw pieces, making them worth reading, and I am so, so grateful

So, Chuck, Castiel’s dad, was not dead in a ditch somewhere like Dean secretly had hoped.  Death seemed like an appropriate punishment for a father who had abandoned his children.  Hell, John was a shit father, but he never left.  He was there.  Not Chuck though.  One look from a twenty something, wanna-be model and he had just left. No warning, no goodbye. Literally just left his kids, with a note and a promise to send money.   And yeah he had sent a shit ton of money each month, made sure that they had house staff to look after and care for them.  But money would never make up for the kind of emotional shit he had put them through.  Especially Cas, who had lost his mother, twin brother, and then his father all within a few years.  Dean was furious at the man.  He wouldn't let Chuck hurt Cas again.  Or let Chuck worm his way into their family and be called "grandpa" like Bobby - he didn't deserve it.  No way in fucking hell.    

But it was not really about what he wanted, was it?  Ultimately, Cas had to make that decision. Had it been Deans alone, Chuck was not allowed anywhere nearby his alpha or their babies. At the same time, he had kept trying to repair his relation to John. Kept hoping that things turned out differently. 

  

Dean remembered that first night's conversation.  Coming home, he had expected upset alpha but only because Dean had left the apartment angry.  Not willing to compromise with Cas over a house.  He had never expected Cas to tell him his dad had called him and wanted to reunite.  Nor did he expect Cas to be so upset, so unsure.    

“So, what does your dad want?”   

“To be a part of our life.” Cas repeated, slowly, like Dean had not heard him the first time.   

“Yeah, well, no shit Sherlock, got that the first time around.  But why now?  Why wasn’t he interested in your life a year ago?  Five years ago?”   

“No idea.” Cas sighed. “I am also inclined to decline his request. Honestly, I am not sure I want him in my life.”   

Up to that point Dean had known only the bare basics of Cas' childhood.  Cas had treated his father's absence casually, inconsequential to his ultimate development and happiness.  Something he had dealt with in therapy.  Accepted and moved on from.  But Dean could tell from Cas' troubled look, the telltale tracks of drying tears, and the overwhelming bitter scent of hurt alpha, that it was not so simple.   He knew he needed to know more.    

“It is not like he needs an answer right away Cas. How about some coffee, and then we can talk about it?”   

“Yeah.” Cas agreed, so Dean ordered him to warm up the sofa while he brewed the coffee.  Decaf of course.  He also found a bag of cookies from Gabriel.  Cas needed comfort, sweetness to counteract his bitter scent, and honestly, Dean was totally craving Gabe's cookies.  Yes, he had just had pie.  But he was pregnant and had cravings.  Sue him.   

“So, let me get this straight." Dean began as he placed the French press, cups, and cookies on the coffee table.  "Your old man who has not talked to you in what, 15 years or something, just out of the blue calls you to let you know that now he is ready to step up and take part in your life?”    

“Yes.” Cas agreed.  Picking up a cookie.  

“Did he give a reason?  Like is he dying or something?”    

“No. He said he had been following my life for awhile now and had heard that I had recently mated and that my mate was pregnant.  That he knew he had no right to ask, but he was hoping for my forgiveness and maybe, just maybe I would allow him to be part of my life again.  He sounded sincere."  

“What do you want, Cas?”   

His alpha was quiet for a long while, just staring at the cookie in his hand like it held all the answers of the universe.  "I don't know Dean, I just don't know."  

  

Nothing had been decided that evening.  It was not a problem with an easy or quick solution.  Although it did force Dean and Cas to communicate in a more open and healthy manner.    

They had gone to a therapy session with Benny together and Cas had seen him twice alone.  Cas was sharing more details about his upbringing and his family with Dean though it was easy to tell that it still hurt like a bitch every time Cas told him something. Part of Dean wanted to shelter Cas, to not ask him more questions, but he knew that talking was needed for his alpha to get past the problems. So Dean asked. And he listened.  

Dean was learning to compromise.  A bit.  He agreed to look at houses both for sale and for rent.  And to discuss equal financing or payment options if, and only if, they found a house to buy.  At times Dean wanted to tell Cas to go and buy a fucking house, just to see his alpha happy again.  But he knew fully giving up his independence would not make him happy and in turn would also make Cas unhappy.  So, he sort of compromised.   It still frustrated Cas, but Dean offset that by allowing the alpha to take care of him and the pups in other ways.   

Cas was awesome at massages and was even learning to cook some basic meals.  They had even attended a parenting class at the local community college.  Cas learning to diaper like a pro.  If the alpha occasionally went overboard on his spending, Dean forgave him especially when greeted with Cas' latest purchase and his alpha's gummy smile as he explained why the babies needed yet another pair of shoes. While Dean thought it to be just a tiny bit ridiculous to buy shoes for someone who could not walk, he had to agree on the adorableness of tiny shoes.      

But although they were happy and the pups were growing and healthy, Dean could see that Chuck's presence still weighed heavily on Cas.  Heartbreakingly, it was now Cas who was suffering from nightmares.  The stress of his decision subconsciously bringing back issues Cas thought he had dealt with. Sometimes he awoke with Jimmy’s name on his lips as he pleaded with him to stop and not get in the car.  And sometimes Cas cried out for his father which further fueled Dean's hate for Chuck.  Dean simply held Cas close, like Cas had done for him so often when their situations had been reversed. That night was no exception.    

"Do you want to talk about the nightmare Cas?"   

“It's not the nightmare Dean.  It's my brain trying to tell me I need to make a decision.  I just don't know what to decide though. Before Jimmy died...." Cas closed his eyes and took a deep, shuddering breath.  Dean strengthened his hold on Cas, placing a tender kiss to his temple.  And waited.     

"Before Jimmy died, Chuck was a wonderful father.  He was kind and attentive and loving.  I just have so many memories of him just being there.  On the floor in my room helping me put together Lego fortresses, walking Jimmy and I to school, cheering from the sidelines as we played soccer, reading to us at night before we went to bed.  He was a wonderful father.  And that man would have been a wonderful grandfather.  But after...after, he closed himself off.   I barely remember the first few years after Jimmy's death.  I was hardly alive, so full of guilt for not dying with Jimmy.  For being the survivor.  And Chuck, he seemed to blame me too.  He could barely look at me without crying.  Was there less and less while therapists and caretakers were there more and more. And after awhile he stopped being there physically altogether."    

"His goodbye note said he was doing research for his new book and would be home soon.  That we were all old enough to look after each other and money would be forwarded to take care of expenses. Two months later we saw his wedding announcement in the newspaper.  He had married a model.  She was twenty two.  Younger than Michael.   We never heard from him directly again.  Just cashed his checks."        

Pulling back from Dean's embrace, he placed a hand on Dean's rounded belly and sighed again.    

“He has failed me in so many ways.  He has hurt me and I'll be damned if I let him hurt my family.  But part of me wants to talk to him.  Wants my father back.  Wants my pups to know their grandfather.  I just don't know what to do Dean."  Cas stated, conflicted, tear filled blue eyes now focused on Dean.     

Dean's hand joined Cas' and both stroked the swollen skin of his stomach.  It seemed to soothe both men, knowing that their twins were in there, healthy and safe.    

"Cas, I really, really hate your father.  Probably as much as you hate mine.  But, he is your father.  And I think....I think you might need to see Chuck, to get some closure.   It is ultimately up to you alpha, but if you decide to see him then I will support your decision and I will be there if you need me.  I love you Cas and I promise I will protect you and our pups."   

Cas settled back into Dean's embrace, nose in the crook of Dean's neck, scenting deeply.  Dean hoped his scent communicated that his words were true, that his alpha had his unconditional love and support no matter what his decision.   As Cas drifted into a calm, ultimately dreamless sleep, Dean took that as his confirmation.   Cas trusted him to take care of him, like he trusted Cas that night in his living room not so long ago.    

No one would hurt his alpha ever again.  No one.   


	5. Have a cookie, baby bro

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas visits Gabriel to get things off his chest

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for the time this took me to get aired, but both me and my beta is quite busy. I will update as often as possible and rest assured, that I have not decided to stop writing this series. 
> 
> I am also struggeling with writing fluffy stuff. For some reason it is so much easier to write angst if you are me. *sigh*. I may therefore update the Please never hate me seres more often than this, just because it is quite angsty at the moment. What can I say? I am an evil author apparently.
> 
> I still hope you are with me and that you enjoy what I am writing. I enjoy writing it, I enjoy you comments. So thank you so much for your support!

Cas loved his omega with every part of his being, but to say that Dean was frustrating was an understatement.  The alpha felt helpless, not being allowed by his own goddamned mate to provide his family the basic need of shelter.  Dean had finally compromised (his word) and agreed to borrow his half of the house price from Cas instead of the bank, but only if they could not find a good house to rent and were forced to buy.  But then Dean proceeded to only set up viewings for rentals and shoot down potential houses for sale – mostly taking issue with the overall price.    

"It doesn't matter if I can borrow the money from you if the house is too expensive for me to ever pay off the loan.  I'd still become the kept omega.  I'd owe you.  Be owned by you.  I can't do that Cas.  I need to be your equal partner in this.  Don’t you understand?"  Dean pleaded. 

And Cas did understand.  His mind did anyway, but his heart, his instincts they disagreed.  The alpha wanted to provide for his family.  It was something that he could do and wanted to do and ultimately he never, ever wanted Dean to pay him back.  Hell, he would put the house deed in Dean's name only if that made him feel better about it.   But all his assurances, his constant appreciation of Dean's contributions to their partnership, did not change Dean's mind or his worry of being viewed as a stereotypical omega.  Recently, after viewing a few rentals that were in their price range, but in Cas' opinion needed to be condemned, Dean had commented that maybe they should keep their apartment, save their money, and restart the house hunt a year or two after the babies were born.  Cas simply started at him incredulously.  Surely, Dean was joking?  They could cram everything into their apartment, but the bedroom barely had room for one crib, so the babies would have to share.  What if the twins had different sleeping schedules or had to be separated at night?  The bathroom did not even have a tub, how would they bath the babies?  And going up and down stairs every day with two carriers and a double stroller.  Yes, Dean must be joking.   

It was a daily fight with his alpha's instincts, to not just go out and buy a house for them. Cas only resisted because he knew that Dean would hate him for taking away his voice in the matter and his feeling of independence.   But when he came home today, he found Dean boxing up stuff to give away or put in storage and referring to a book on organizing for a small space.  When Dean asked if they could convert the dining area into the baby's nursery, Cas knew he needed a break.    

 

Gabriel placed a plate of cookies in front of him, worry on his face.  

“You look unhappy, Cassie.” 

“I am no such thing.” He sighed, grabbing a cookie. “But I am very frustrated.”  

“Dean?” It was far from the first time that Cas had either called Gabe or showed up unannounced in their old apartment, smelling like dull anger, frustration and a bitter-salty tang of unhappiness strong enough for even a beta to pick up. 

“He is getting better... But yes.” Cas moved uncomfortable.  

“So what is going on between the two of you? Is it still the house-thing?” 

“Yeah.”  

“It is not easy, huh?” Gabriel sat down, cookie in his left hand. “I mean, most omegas would give their right arm and a foot for an alpha like you. Good looking. Kind. Progressive. Rich.  You have got yourself a weird ass omega baby bro.”  

Castiel huffed. “I have. And I just… I wish I could remove that part of him that thinks he's unworthy of good things.  His upbringing was bad enough before he presented as omega.  I just wish he did not care so much about what his dad would think about us. What society would assume if he lets me pay for his house.” 

“Worrying about everyone else's opinion is a Winchester thing.” Gabriel said, a sadness to his smile and eyes that almost made Cas ask for explanation.  Something told him though that it was deeper than this conversation. But Gabe would talk if he wanted or needed to, Cas knew that. 

“I sometimes wish I could raise John up and kill him again for what he did to them.  Dean is doing so well but it is still nailed to his core with thumb-thick nails that he is less of a man because he is an omega… especially since he is in a relationship with a male alpha.  I know Sam is a beta, but I cannot imagine it was any easier for him.” Cas remarked. 

Gabriel made an agreeing sound and got them a beer.  

Cas took a deep breath and brought up the other reason for his visit.  “Uh, Chuck...dad...called me.”  

Gabriel stopped in the middle of his movement. Stiff. On guard.   

“Dad?” He repeated, starring at his younger brother with wide eyes. 

“He called after Dean and I had argued about houses again. I guess the word of me becoming a mate and father has reached him. He wants to talk to me.  To be part of my life again.  In my family's life.  Dean and the pups.” Cas elaborated, watching Gabriel intensely. While Gabriel had been old enough to take care of himself when their father disappeared it had still hurt him deeply.  Gabe claimed he never regretted his decision to be Cas' guardian and Cas was certainly appreciative.  But Cas also knew Gabe dropped out of college and missed out on a lot of youthful experiences in order to take care of him.   

“So what did you tell him?” Others would have bought the nonchalant façade. But others did not know his brother like Cas did.  

“That I would think about it. After all the decision involves Dean and our pups, so I thought maybe he would want them to know their grandfather.  To have him in their life.”  

“Oh.” 

“But well, Dean is not interested in meeting him or letting Chuck anywhere near our pups.  He said he would not risk Chuck becoming part of their lives and then ditching them."   

“You mate may be annoying as hell at times, but I agree with him on that one.” Gabriel looked visible relaxed. 

“He can be.” Cas agreed, no longer as reluctant to admit that his perfect mate had flaws as well. Stubbornness for one. But they were pretty much equal in that one.   And without his stubborn mind Dean would never had made it as far as he had.    

"But...Dean also thinks I should meet with Chuck to get some closure.  Since Chuck's call, I've not been able to sleep well and its brought up a lot of memories and emotions I thought I had dealt with.  I'm back in therapy because of it."  Cas admitted.   

Gabe for once had no quick reply.  No sarcastic comment.  He simply sat silently and stared at Cas.   

"What do you think Gabe?  What you would do?"  Cas inquired.   

One beer turned into two.  

Two turned into several and several beers made whiskey seem like a good idea. Gabriel tried to teach Cas poker again, but failed miserably. 

 

Had doors always been this difficult to open? Cas turned and pulled on the door handle, putting his entire weight on it. The handle moved, but the door did not, even though he kept pulling it.  

Could it be locked? Could Dean have locked the door? Yeah. Sure. He fished out his keys and after a few tries even managed to get the right key into the keyhole, but still the door refused to open up.  

Growling he put the keys back into his pocket, starring at the door like that would make it open. Then he realising his mistake, he grinned widely as he pushed the door forward while turning the door handle, and upti vupti magic jacuzzi the door opened for him.  

Dean was standing on the other side of the door, arms crossed. He looked annoyed. Cas responded by swinging the door closed and sending his beloved omega a wide smile.  

“You have been gone for fucking  _hours_  Cas. I called you like 10 times, and you couldn't even bother picking up you goddamned phone? And then you get home, smelling like a fucking distillery! Goddammit, where have you been? At a bar?” Dean asked, anger in his voice.  

“Don’t touch me.” The omega growled as Cas tried to step in closer, to hug him, ensure him that he had done no such thing.  

“I have been with Gabe.” He did not slur very much. If not for the seriousness of the situation he would have been proud of how almost-sober he sounded.  

“And you could not bother picking up your phone?” 

“I forgot it Dean. I am so sorry.” He looked pleadingly at his lover. He had not left for Gabriel’s to make Dean upset. He had just needed air. Needed to talk with his big brother.   

“Do you have any idea of how worried you got me? Goddammit Cas, I thought you had left because I am so difficult to be around...” Dean's voice cracked as tears filled his green eyes.  

“No Dean. Never.” 

“… Figured that anyone in their right mind would do so.” Dean continued, letting Cas walk into his personal space and hug him tightly. His stomach was filling out quite some space, making their hug somewhat awkward, but neither cared.  

“You are not difficult.” Cas reminded him, gently drying the tears of his cheeks before kissing him softly.  

“God. You taste like a distillery too.” Dean complained, trying to make himself laugh and failing miserably.  

Cas hauled him in for another kiss, not caring that his omega protested or that the world rotated ever so slightly around them.  

They ended up embracing each other for quite a while seeking comfort in simple touch. Dean had not been mad at him, not really, just damned worried that Cas had suddenly decided to leave or had gotten hurt.  

  

“Come on alpha. You are drunk, you need a shower and a toothbrush, a shitload of water and a bed.” Dean playfully swatted his ass as they walked towards the bathroom. His omega still smelled sad underneath his sassiness but Cas would take what he could get.  

“Are you going to join me?” Cas wiggled his brows in what he hoped was a flirtatious manner.  

“In the shower?” Dean spluttered. “Cas, it is late and I need to get ready for work tomorrow, pack our lunches, and… and Gabriel sent this link to a house one of his customers is selling.  It looks nice.  Maybe we can look at it together?”  

“Mhm. We can do all that after a shower.” He leaned in, trying to be flirty, but ended up being halfway supported by his omega. “I could blow you.” Cas offered, sweetening the deal.  

“You would choke.” Dean answered but followed with him into the bathroom, stating he was only there to make sure Cas was OK. Cas had to happily agree. Last time he had been drunk and showered he slipped and hurt himself. It had not been serious, but it had hurt like a bitch and his friends, which included his now mate, had teased him for days after finding out the cause of his injuries.   

Cas hummed as his omega undressed him, then turned to return the favour. No matter how self-conscious Dean was about his changing body, Cas found him gorgeous. 

“Done staring?” Dean moved uncomfortably to turn on the water as Cas just kept looking at him.  

“Doubt that will ever happen.” Cas shrugged, giving him another intense look. Yup, his man was hot as fuck and knowing he was carrying their children just made it even better.  

“Just wait until I am like 40 with a saggy stomach and my ass all the way down to my knees.” Dean rolled his eyes before stepping under the running water.  

“I would still like looking at you.” He told his lover with all the sincerity he could before joining him under the hot spray (or what little Dean had left for him). “And touching you.” He added, slowly letting his hands run over Dean’s ribs, his waist and hips before dragging him in closer.  

“I love you Dean. And nothing will ever change that. No matter how stubborn you are or how hormone-crazy you get.” Cas promised, leaning in for a kiss.  

Dean returned the kisses with soft, curious ones. The stress of these last few weeks had been hard on both of them and time for kissing and loving each other had been limited. Not that they had not wanted to, but the pregnancy, their disagreements about the house, their talks, the nightmare interrupted sleep, often left either or both bone-deep exhausted.  

Cas gently washed both of them down, taking good time to devour Dean as he did.  Not feeling stable enough to give a safe blow-job, Cas took Dean's cock in his hand and slowly rubbed him to climax.  With relaxed, happy omega in his arms, they continued to make out under the hot shower spray, Cas grinding against Dean's hip like a teenager, coming unsurprisingly quickly.  They re-rinsed and left the shower, Cas convincing Dean to join him in bed, but only after he drank a bottle of water and took some aspirin under the omega's watchful eye.    

Spooned together under the covers, Dean spoke.  "It’s a really good house Cas...the one Gabe sent me info on.  He put me in touch with the realtor.  It's an estate sale.  The owner died.  It was a family house, but all the kids have families and homes of their own.  It needs work, needs updating, but the kids really want a family to buy it." 

Cas blinked silently, spooned up behind Dean, hands around his belly.  Was his stubborn omega actually saying there was a house for sale that he wanted to look at?  That he might consider buying?  He was going to owe Gabe so, so much, but it would be worth it.   

"It definitely sounds like a house worth looking at Dean.  Especially if you have a good feeling about it.  Set up a time with a realtor, anytime, and I will be there."  

The scent of happy omega filled Cas' nose as Dean responded with a simple, "OK, Cas", his hands coming to join Cas' on his belly.  Both men quickly fell into a sated, deep sleep.      

 

In another part of the town, Gabriel picked up his phone, dialling a way too familiar number.

_“Hello. Chuck speaking.”_

“What the hell Chuck?” Gabriel growled into the receiver.

_"Gabe?"_

"Yea pops, its me.  What the hell were you thinking contacting Cas? I told you not to. I told you to stay the fuck away from him.”

_“I take it that he has told you about my call.”_

“Yes, and he should have! Don’t you think that kid god enough to worry about without you sticking out your head like a troll out of a box?” Gabe continued. “You should have called me first. Should have asked me if he was ready. I could have broken it to him in a gentler manner.”

_“I just want to make sure that he is alright, Gabriel.”_

“You just made sure of the opposite by calling him!”

“Oh.”

“Oh? Oh is what you are having to say about this? Do you have any idea what kind of dilemma you have placed him in? Goddammit pops, Cas is back in fucking therapy because of that call!”

He could hear his dad starting to explain himself or apologize. Gabriel did not care. Instead he shut down the line, throwing the phone away. He had agreed to keep Chuck posted on how Cas where doing, yeah, and he had done so for years. Chuck had been too mentally unstable to take care of a child back then, but Cas was a man know. What was there dad thinking about?


	6. Greens and Yellows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Awaiting twins means scans and the possibility for baby movements. No one can blame Dean for being excited, huh?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again a shout out to my wonderful beta, [LadyHawke72](http://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyHawke72/pseuds/LadyHawke72) who is a wizard with words. Sure, I write, but she is the one somehow making this work out, reminding me when I forget something and the fact that timelines is somewhat necessary. I have not enough words to thank her for her work and inspiration, and believe me, this story would not have been what it is without her.

Dean was all jittery. He was unable to sit still. Unable to take a few deep breaths and calm himself. There were multiple reasons for that. He had just passed his 18 week mark, meaning that he had his anomaly scan appointment with Donna later that week.  18 weeks also meant that he soon would be able to feel the babies move.  He had been tracking his developmental milestones on his favorite information source – the internet – but for Cas' peace of mind, he had also bought the book, "What to Expect When Expecting" which had said the exact same thing.  So, yup, jittery.  Excited jittery,  Dean thought, rubbing his belly absent mindingly, but still jittery.  Dean had also booked a time with the realtor of the house Gabriel had recommended. Cas had agreed to see the house simply because his omega asked, but after looking at the online pictures he was even more convinced.  Something about the place just seemed right to the both of them. The size. The garden. The number of bathrooms. Dean just hoped the house was as good in person as it was in pictures.  They had been mislead before.   

Oh, and Cas had agreed to meet with Chuck the week after Dean's scan.   After talking about it together and after consulting Gabriel and Benny, Cas decided to meet with Chuck without Dean.  As Cas explained, there was no point in Chuck meeting Dean if he decided not to ever see him again.  Cas had also decided to meet with Chuck at Benny's office with Benny in attendance.  Although Dean would prefer to be the one at the meeting supporting his alpha, he understood Cas' concerns and trusted that Benny would intercede if needed.     

So yeah, Dean had a lot of things looking forward to, but also to worry about and that left him jittery and with too much energy. Before becoming pregnant, before Cas, he would have gotten nice and drunk. Instead Dean threw himself into work – working on _every_ _car_ he could possibly get his hands on. Even between working, cleaning, cooking and having epic amounts of sex he still found himself all weird.  He felt off.   

  

“Sit down. Relax.” Castiel ordered.  As Dean paced throughout their apartment. 

Dean glared at him but did so anyway.  

It seemed to be a longer than usual day, waiting to leave for Donna's office, for the anomaly scan.  Dean's jittery feeling,  the need to move, to do something was practically overwhelming.   

At the 12-week scan they established that the twins were not sharing a placenta.  Donna had told him that if they had been sharing a placenta, she would have to perform scans every second week due to risk for complications like growth abnormalities or one twin not getting enough nutrition. While Dean would have loved seeing his babies on the screen more often, he was relieved. Dean tended to worry enough as it was, having more to worry about was not a good thing.  Since twins were still a high risk pregnancy, he would still be getting a scan every month starting his 20th week and until he gave birth.   

The 16-week anomaly scan was to detect any developmental problems or illnesses.  Donna had given them an informational handout about the potential problems the scan was looking for, but Dean and Cas had refused to even read it.  As Cas stated there was no reason to worry unless they had a reason to, but it still did not keep Dean's mind from racing.   

Less than a half hour later, Dean was on his feet again and heading to the door, his alpha following obediently behind him.   Dean knew they would be arriving at Donna's office early, but Dean did not care.  He wanted the scan done and over with.  He wanted to know that his babies were OK.  He huffed with impatience.  He was barely halfway through his pregnancy and already he was having trouble getting in and out of the impala.  Finally settled, the car's newly installed seatbelt only enhanced the roundness of his stomach.   Cas simply grinned fondly at him as from the passenger seat.    

Dean glared at his alpha again.  

“Next time you are carrying the babies.” He told Cas. 

“I can’t be. Don’t have the necessary equipment.” 

Dean rolled his eyes.  It seemed the alpha was catching on to sarcasm. 

 

They were seated in Donna's waiting room almost an hour before they were scheduled to be there.  

“We should ask for print-outs again. Or a CD with the pictures? Then we could print them out ourselves. I mean… everyone in or family would like to have pictures, don’t you think so? Or we could post it on Facebook.” Dean rambled, tapping one foot impatiently. “I am also doing another restoration video with Charlie next week. It is going to be the first video where there is no doubt that I am pregnant.  Goddamit Cas, what if I get those nasty comments again?”  

When Dean had uploaded the first of his mustang-videos, he had presented himself. Gender and everything, believing that his followers at that point had cared more about his work than his status. For the most part he had been right. The majority of comments either made no mention of his presentation and concentrated simply on the work while others congratulated him on breaking stereotypes.  But a few, a few had been bad.  There were comments like ‘I would love to bend you over the hood and take you like the bitch you are’ and ‘omegas shouldn’t be taking a man’s job. Go home and cook girl’.   And although those comments were the minority, they still weighed heavily in his mind.  His father's voice being the voice he heard when he had read them.   

“You block them. You block them and report them like you did with the others.” Cas stated simply. Then something in his eyes turned hard and possessive. “Or you can give me their names. Then I will make sure that they learn the consequences of writing such disgusting comments to my amazing, talented mate.”  

Dean could sense Cas'changing scent and, to not upset anyone in the waiting room with angry alpha, he leaned in and kissed Cas, taking his hand and placing it on his belly.  

“I know you would sweetheart, and believe me, both me and the pups are very grateful. But I am a big boy, I can take care of myself.” He softly promised. “Besides, last time Charlie took screenshots of the comments and send it to their moms. It was hilarious.”  

Cas laughed softly, trying to imagine grown ass alpha and beta men being confronted with their sexist’s comments by their moms (or omega dads for that matter!). Without any doubt, there would be some mothers who did not care very much or agreed, but he hoped that some did chastise their sons.  

They chatted about lighter topics until they were escorted back for their ultrasound scan. Dean was really happy that he had a doctor who could also perform ultrasounds so that he did not have to deal with more than one.   Plus, he really liked Donna.  She always made him feel taken care of, like he mattered.  Even when he was messed up she treated him in the same caring manner.   

“Hello boys.” Donna sent them a gentle smile as they entered the scan room.  She was not much older than Dean, but still felt very motherly towards him.  Cas was just happy that Dean had a doctor he felt safe around.  

Dean took off his shoes before getting on the bed, leaning back until he sat comfortably.  

“You are getting big, huh?” Donna gave his stomach a nod and a smile before asking him to lift up his shirt. Dean complied without any hesitation knowing what to expect. He still cringed when the cold ultrasound gel was smeared across his abdomen.  

“I feel like a stranded whale already! And I know that I have at have like 20 more weeks like this…” Dean made a dramatic sighing sound while rolling his eyes.  

“You just wait. The real joys of pregnancy haven't even arrived yet.” She teased, gently placing the transducer against his skin.  

He just groaned having read way too much about swollen feet.  

The grainy image made Dean happy that he laid down. His knees felt soft and he was not sure that he would have been able to stand on his own.   The image of their babies just as overwhelming as the first time he saw it.  Today, their pups laid with their toes against each other, cheek to cheek, faces staring straight at the monitor.  They seemed to be about the same size.  Dean and Cas had discussed it and decided on not knowing the genders of the pups. Instead they had agreed on making the nurseries gender-neutral in color and being surprised at the birth.  Dean was satisfied with the decision. He did not want his kids to face gender stereotypes from birth, to be force fed the belief that if they had a penis, they had to like blue and sports.  And if not, it was pink and playing house.  He wanted to be a better dad than John and Cas was definitely going to be – so from birth his pups were going to be told that they could present any gender, be whatever they wanted to be and would be loved regardless.   

For a few moments Dean just followed the shifting pictures as Donna moved the transducer around, taking measurements and whatever else she needed to do for the anomaly check. Cas squeezed his hand to the point where it was almost painful. Looking at him for a moment it became clear that he was just as touched as Dean was, but even his overwhelming happiness could not erase the lines of worry griming his expression of love. Dean looked at Donna who smiled towards him. Nothing in her stature, smell or facial expression told him that she suspected anything was wrong with his babies, so he took a deep breath, calming himself and his alpha.  

“As you can see.” She pointed at the screen. “Each baby has a placenta of it’s own. They do not share chorionic or amniotic sacks.” As far as Dean was concerned she was pointing at something that seemed a bit lighter grey than the background.  But he trusted that she knew one kind of grey from another.   

“As far as I can tell everything is fine in there. One twin is ever so slightly smaller than the other, but that is perfectly normal. What we do from here on is to make sure that they both keep growing as they are supposed to. If you haven’t already you should be able to feel them move very soon.” She continued. “Really, congratulations boys. Everything seems perfectly fine in there. Do you any questions?”  

Well, yeah, Dean had, it was just… They were freaking embarrassing. He almost wanted to ask Cas to leave, but then again his alpha had already noticed a lot of the problems.  

“Is it normal that I keep… you know, leaking?” He felt his cheeks grow red as Donna handed him tissues to wipe the gel off his stomach.  

“As in getting wet? Yes, that is perfectly normal. Bodies are not smart enough to figure out that the added blood-flow is for the baby and not because you are aroused.” She smiled toward him. “As are problems with digestion, farting like it is a competition and partial incontinence just to name a few of the more embarrassing things that can happen during a pregnancy.” 

“Why did no one hand me a warning-list before I decided on project baby?”  

Donna just laughed and scheduled them for another ultrasound 4 weeks later.  

“You know Dean, just call if you need to talk about anything, alright?” She told him before they left the scan-room.  

“Yeah, thank you Donna.” Dean smiled, as did Cas. Both knew that Cas would be more than welcome to call her too if anything concerned him regarding Dean or his pregnancy.  

  

Dean handed Cas the keys to the impala.  

“I really feel like take away and licorice.” Dean told his mate who simply smiled and drove to the store. They ended up buying raspberries, oranges, and 5 different types of licorice as Dean could not decide what he or the babies truly craved.  

Arriving home they ordered pizza, deciding on a cozy evening in front of the television. They ended up watching the Hunger Games while binging on pizza (Dean added licorice as a topper to his pizza much to Castiel’s horror) and popcorn.  They allowed themselves to forget that they still had not solved their housing problem, that Cas still had to face Chuck.  Instead they enjoyed their time together.  Celebrated that their babies were healthy.  They kissed. They talked.  They made love to one another.  Truly, it was a perfect night.   

 


	7. Possibly perfect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean and Cas may finally have found the place for them and their pups

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feeeeeeels. Warning for fucking feels 
> 
> Hope you guys are still with me. Hope you still like this. 
> 
> Another thank to my beta who made the crappy piece of a shitty chapter I send her into this. The flow is so much better, things makes sense!

It was finally time.  

Dean pressed his foot on the gas pedal, but still made sure to go exactly the speed limit.  His alpha would scold him otherwise.  He wanted to see the house so badly. Wanted it to be the perfect place for him and Cas and their babies. Cas rode shotgun, quiet and thoughtful, but he was also excited too.  His scent smelled like that anyway.   This was the first time either of them was hopeful about a house, this one had captured their attention from the first time they saw pictures of it. He really hoped that this house could be the one for their family.  

Dean parked the car, the realtor's car was already there, most likely she was arranging flowers or making the house more presentable and welcoming.   She must have been waiting for them at the door as she came out to greet them immediately with a big smile on her face.  

“I am Hannah.” She presented herself, giving both of them a firm handshake. “Congratulations on the pregnancy. I assume that is why you are looking for a new place?” 

Dean smiled and nodded in response, absentmindedly stroking a hand over his tummy.  

“Then I think you will find this place to be perfect.” She said, smiling even wider.  

Cas grabbed his hand as she started the tour, telling them about the history of the house, showing them each room, the garden, the attached garage and, to her credit, the areas and things in need of repair and renovation.  But something about the place just kept feeling right to Dean, even with all the work that needed to be done.  He was very much "in like" with the place and growing more smitten by the minute. He wasn't quite in love since there was so much to be done to truly make the house their home. But the house was structurally sound and he could definitely see it's potential. 

Once Hannah finished the tour, she left Dean and Cas alone to talk and explore the house on their own.   

“So what do you think, alpha?” Dean asked, purring and sending his love a flirting smile in hopes of influencing Cas.    

“I like it.” Cas stated simply, not distracted by Dean's flirting. As in, at all. “But there is a lot of work to be done, and you will soon be too big for taking on any physical work.”  

That just made Dean laugh.  “Aren’t you supposed to be the big strong, tough alpha anyway?” He teased.  

“And the one with 11 thumbs as you so sweetly like to put it.” Cas pointed out, kissing Deans temple with affection.  

He was not embarrassed that his omega was better at physical, hands on work than he was. If anything he was proud.  He never believed in defining a person by their gender or conceding to stereotypical gender roles.  Besides, Cas had his talents.  He was business savvy and invested well. He might not be able to build a house, but he could pay for the house and any repairs it might need.   

“True.” Dean agreed. “But think about it. A lot of what needs to be done is cosmetic and can wait until after I have the twins.  The kitchen is one ugly, pea green motherfucker, sure, but everything works in there, so nothing really needs to be done right now.  A lot of  things could also be done over a weekend or two if we can get help.”   

He shrugged, then his entire face lit up in a bright smile as he leaned into his alpha, kissing his way along his neck.   

“The garage is big enough for Baby and your car and maybe even a small workplace for me.  And I really, really love the yard Cas. It's big.  You can grow flowers that attract the bees, and plant a hippie vegetable garden for you and Sam and there is space for the pups to play and for a swing set… I can barbeque on the porch and we can eat outside in the summer.  The yard's even fenced in with a white picket fence Cas!  A white picket fence.  It's perfect!” 

“Your omega wiles don’t work on me, Winchester.  I won't be bribed.  But luckily I do agree with you. I think this house could be our home.”  

Dean pulled back and starred wide-eyed at his alpha.  His eyes got even bigger as Cas got down on his knees, placing an ear to Dean's protruding stomach.  

“Uh.. Aha… Yes, I see.” Cas mumbled, while stroking a hand softly over the outstretched skin.  

With a serious face, he got up and looked at Dean. “It would seem that the pups agree about the house. They have also informed me about the benefits of having two floors for when they turn into teenagers… and room for more babies, as they may one day wish for a younger sister or brother to torment.”  

Dean just gave his alpha a fond look, stepping into his outstretched arms.  He was pretty sure they had just agreed to buy the house. 

Hannah, who had been waiting outside, hurried towards them as they stepped outside onto the front porch. "So what are your thoughts on the house?" She inquired with a hopeful smile.   

“We are very interested.” Cas admitted.  

“Great! How about I email you all the details on the house and you take some time to discuss your next steps? Then you can call me if you have any questions or when you are ready to buy.” The she said, smiling again.   

“We will.” Dean promised, gripping her outstretched hand to shake in agreement.  

Dean ended up driving them home, but unlike the drive over he was now calm. This was their house.  He just knew it.    

  

… 

  

Caught up discussing the house, neither man notice the man on the front steps of their apartment building until they were almost at the door.   

Cas recognized the man immediately. Chuck had not changed much if at all. Maybe his hair was a little greyer, a little thinner. His midline softer. But the slightly beseeching look he gave when his eyes landed on Cas, the way his face lit up into a smile… Cas was torn between the desire to throw himself into his father's arms or decking him.  So he stopped outside his father's reach and said nothing.  

“Cas?” Dean looked confused and the alpha remembered that his mate had never met his father or knew what he looked like.  

“It's him.  It's Chuck”  

“Chuck? But… But it is Tuesday, not Thursday…and he's here?” the omega replied confused.  

“He has always been a little impulsive.” Cas admitted with a soft sigh.  

“You don’t look very much alike.”  

“No, not really. But I don't look like Gabriel either. I take after my mother's side of the family.”  

Dean made an agreeing sound. Cas figured that the omega could feel and smell how nervous and conflicted he was. He had not seen his father in _years_ and there Chuck stood, alive and well, on the wrong day, on his front steps and not in the protective space of Benny's office.  

How was he supposed to greet the father who abandoned him? It was not exactly a common situation.  But Chuck was here and it did not look like he was leaving soon.   

Taking a deep breath, Cas stepped forward towards Chuck and held out his hand in greeting.   

Chuck looked hurt at being offered a handshake instead of a hug, but he grabbed Cas' hand never the less.  

“Father, this is my mate, Dean.” Cas told the shorter man, stepping aside so that Dean could meet the grandfather of their pups.  

“Nice to meet you too Dean.” Chuck told him.  

“A pleasure, sir.” Dean said as he held out his own hand. Cas could tell that his omega really did not think it was a pleasure, his mouth was set in a firm line and his eyes were hard.  But Dean said nothing more, looking instead at his alpha for guidance.  

Cas typed the code to the apartment complex and pushed open the door when the security system buzzed entrance.  

“Come on in. There is coffee.” Cas informed his father with a gentle smile.   

The first half hour the men spent in the living room, sipping coffee and awkwardly talking about nothing.  Dean was talking the most, easing the tension as he answered Chuck's questions about his pregnancy.  Cas was proud of his mate.  He was protective of Cas and would not hesitate to throw Chuck out if he said or did something that hurt his alpha.  But for now, he was giving Cas time to come to grips with his long lost father being in their living room.  Letting Cas decide how to proceed. 

“Well, I had a long day.  I think I am going to go lie down in the bedroom and relax.  Let you two talk.” Dean stated as he stood up abruptly, both Cas and Chuck getting to their feet as well.   

"It was nice to meet you Chuck.  Cas, walk with me?" Dean asked as Chuck sat back down on the sofa. 

At the door to their bedroom, Dean faced Cas and hugged him as tight as he could with the twins in the way.  "You call me if you need anything alpha.  Promise me.  Do not let him hurt you."   

"I promise Dean." Cas replied with a sigh.  Releasing Dean from his arms, he watched fondly as his omega struggled to find comfortable position in bed.  Turning back towards the living room, Cas finally felt mentally prepared to confront his father.  

“Please Castiel…” Chuck started when Cas reappeared.   

“Please what, father?” Cas had settled on father instead of dad, attempting to create an emotional distance. Dad was what he had called Chuck back when he had been there.  

“I…” Chuck stopped himself, seemingly considering his words carefully. “I am sorry for everything. But there is a lot you do not know.” 

“I know plenty.” Cas voice was a low growl, years of hurt, betrayal and strong emotions suddenly overwhelming him. “You _left_ Chuck. And now you want to be part of my life? Why?  Why now?  Because I have babies on the way? Are you going to leave them like you left me?”  

Chuck stiffened, looking at Cas in the middle of lifting the cup of coffee he had been drinking.  

“Is that what you think? What you have been thinking all those years?”  

“Yes, what else was I supposed to think, father?” The last word sounded like venom even in his own ears. Chuck paled. Castiel had not expected to get so mad, so worked up so fast, but he was. Seeing his father again made him feel exactly like he had the day he learned Chuck had left them. 

“Oh god.” Chuck whispered looking somewhat broken. Cas kept quiet, shaking hands clasped in anger.  

It took quite a while before Chuck started talking again.  

“I was sick Cas. That was why I left. I was dangerous to myself, but worse than that, I was a danger to you. I have… You probably don’t remember this, but I have always struggled with my mental health. And after Jimmy… I just. I never… I never got better. I kept blaming myself. I could not look at you, the similarities reminding me of what I had lost…”  

“Sick?” Cas managed to repeat, voice strained. He had no idea if he believed Chuck. 

“Suicidal.” Chuck admitted. “I was in a really bad place Castiel. And… I figured that leaving you would be less traumatic than you finding me hanging from a rope.”  

“Why didn’t you reach out earlier?”  

“I was too unstable.  Barely functioning.  I attempted suicide twice.  And for many years I was in and out of residential treatment facilities.  Our money and the Novak reputation the only reasons why the media did not find out.” 

“Cas, I wasn’t able to be the father you needed or deserved.  I only would have caused you more pain.  And as time went by, I convinced myself that returning would only disrupt your life.  You had settled so well with Gabriel, looked happy.  I did not want to interfere with that.”  

“But I have seen you in the media. On TV.  At book signings.” Cas growled.  Even after he left, Chuck continued to write.  His books were very popular and he did interviews. His dad had seemed _fine_ doing those. 

Chuck sighed. “Have you read my books?” 

“No.” 

“Oh.” Chuck hesitated for a moment. “Well, I used them a lot to cope with how I felt. I did interviews hoping to help others like me…but I had a 24-7 support-person and was often so heavily medicated the interviews had to be edited.” 

“What about your wife? If you were so unstable why did you get married?” 

“I'm not married Cas.  Meg is my support person, my assistant.  The gossip rags started saying we were married and I never corrected them.  It was actually less difficult than having to explain I needed a babysitter to keep me from hurting myself.” His father explained, leaving Castiel utterly confused.  

”But you are OK now?  You are better?” 

”Cas, I will never be 100% fine.  I am bipolar.  There is no cure.  But there are ways to manage my disease.  To stabilize it.  Meg helps me with that too.” Chuck explained. 

”I reached out now because we both seem to be in a safe, stable place.  And I knew that you were strong enough and had the support to make a decision about me being in your life.” 

“So I have been wrong all this time?” Cas asked, looking devastated. He had no idea if he even believed Chuck. But he wanted to, wanted to so badly.  He wanted to believe his father had left to protect him.  Because he was selfless not selfish.  

“Wrong? Why did you think I left?” 

“I figured that you blamed me for Jimmy’s death. That if I had not been sick, you would not have made that detour to the pharmacy on the way to soccer practice. You would never have been hit by the drunk driver and Jimmy would still be alive.” Cas admitted, voice shaking almost as much as his tightly clasped hands. 

“What else was I to think?” He asked, when he saw how his words shocked his father. “I was 12 for god’s sake. I had just lost my brother, and then my dad decided to run away, and each time I saw new pictures of you, it was with this gorgeous woman. I figured that you had left me to run away with a model because you blamed me.”  

Chuck swallowed hard. “I never blamed you Castiel. Not for one second.”  

  

Dean chose that moment to re-enter the living room. If he had been eavesdropping, Cas did not care.  Maybe Chuck had told him the truth. Maybe he had not.  But right now, Cas needed his omega and he needed time to think. 

Rested, pregnant yet hungry omega seemed to ease the tension between the two alphas while allowing an excuse to end Chuck's visit.  Cas leading Chuck to the front door as his omega headed into the kitchen to start dinner.   They parted with another awkward handshake, Chuck holding on to his hopeful smile.  Cas had agreed to meet with him again before Dean gave birth.  This time at his coffee shop. 

After closing his front door, Cas leaned against it with a shuddering breath.  Did he want his dad back in his life? Castiel was uncertain, but he was no longer dead set against it. Their family was not exactly big and having another grandparent to spoil their pups? He wanted that on some level.  But his father had a history of mental health issues.  Did he really want to expose his growing family to that? 

Cas needed to think.  He needed to talk to Gabriel.  He might even need a session with Benny.  But right now all he needed was Dean.  Taking a deep, calming breath Cas started towards the kitchen and to his personal sanctuary.   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will also say, that I do not have ANY personal relations to bipolar disorder. So things may be inaccurate. I have tried doing my research, and more research, but that is not always enough. Disease will also affect everyone differently, so there is that too.   
> I apologize sincerely if anything is completely out of line, but do please remember that this is a fan fic, and that I have to take some liberties (like making males pregnant) to get things to work out. I am however trying my very best to portray mental illness as accurate as I can, given that I myself have suffered and still do, from depression.   
> My take on being bipolar are really what I can read about the illness, both diagnostic and the few personal stories I have found. So again, there will be inaccuracies and I may have screwed up royally.


	8. Papers and pups

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is it possible that things sometimes work out for Dean Winchester? Apparently so.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another shout out to Ladyhawk72 for this chapter. heck, I am pretty sure she has written like half of it. 
> 
> Warnings for fluff and fluff and more fluff. Oh, and smut. 
> 
> I can honestly say that I would have given up on this series if not for her and you guys. All the love <3 
> 
>  
> 
> Oh, and all the apologies for the time this took me. I have been sick, so my days have been consistent of me on the sofa watching teen wolf. Very disapointed over the Sterek-action in that so far. Fever brain and trying to write shit does not work well. What little I have written has been deleted again as it made no sense.

 

As promised, Hannah contacted them with the paperwork.  Both men agreed to the general terms of the sale and the closure and move in dates, but not to the price. Given the amount of renovations needed, Hannah negotiated a lower sale price on their behalf.  Neither man could have been more pleased.  Cas because Dean had finally agreed to let him pay for the house outright.  After a few more talks with Benny and Charlie, Dean realized that letting Cas pay for the house did not emasculate him or make him a kept omega.  Instead it was a healthy compromise since most of Dean's savings would be used to pay for the house renovations.  Ultimately, it made Cas and Dean equal partners in the house ownership.   

Dean was happy. 

Dean rested on the sofa as he contemplated and prioritized the repairs his new home would need.  He found himself doing that a lot lately.  Instead of making him anxious, it actually was quite calming.  It had been a long day at work with a lot of standing, so his lower back and feet hurt like hell. He had a hand on his stomach, caressing the skin. At first he did not feel secure about what he felt, the motion so foreign and familiar at the same time.  

“CAS!” 

He could hear the alpha practically throwing what he had in his hands to run into the living room. Seeing Dean all content on the sofa made him frown in confusion. What was so urgent? 

“I can feel our pups move!” Deans smile was wide. 

“You can what?” 

“Feel them move, you dumbass.”  

Cas sad down on the edge of the couch, lifting Deans shirt up so that he could place his hands directly on the skin.  

“I cannot feel anything.” Cas looked upset as he kept touching the soft skin of his mate’s stomach.  

“You will soon enough.” Dean nodded towards the books they had about pregnancy. “Right now it feels like… uh. Flutters.”  

“You know you can give me your honest description instead of quoting the pregnancy books?” Cas leaned forward, kissing Dean softly.  

“Yeah, but describing our kids as a really big fart or something stuck in my stomach is just… wrong.” He scrunched his nose in contempt. “So flutters it is.”  

Castiel just laughed.  

  

… 

  

They officially signed the ownership papers for the house on a grey day in early December. The owners had agreed to let them start working on the house immediately even though their official closure/move in date wasn’t until the first of January.  So far every weekend in December and a few after work evenings were devoted entirely to house repair duty.  Their family had popped in and out offering assistance as well.  So far Cas had painted the nursery and playroom in happy gender-neutral colors of yellow and white.  The plan was for the babies to room together and share both rooms until they were of age to want their own bedrooms.  Jess and Sam painted the master bedroom in a soft, bluish grey and most everyone helped to paint the small fourth bedroom, the bathrooms and all of the hallways in an off-white. They did not allow Dean in the rooms when they painted, so he used his time to take care of the small repairs he could do without his alpha protesting (“You are not allowed to carry anything heavy Dean!" and "you could fall off that ladder Dean!").  Dean was able to update a few fixtures, install new lightening, replace the sink in the kitchen (with his alpha and Sam doing the heavy lifting of course) and sanded the flecked yellow paint off the windowsills in the kitchen and living room. Cas re-stained the windowsill wood afterwards and even though it was a small amount of stain, he still would not allow Dean nearby ("hell if I am letting you or our pups inhale poisonous fumes Dean!”).   

Dean had wanted to paint the entrance hall and the downstairs rooms too, but those areas all had outdated wallpaper, most of it discolored and frayed, and the process to remove the wallpaper most likely could not be accomplished in the weekends before he gave birth.  But heck, he had spent most of his childhood in run down motel rooms, surely the pups would survive in a house that had ugly wallpaper. At least that is what he kept telling himself, because really he had wanted their home to be perfect when he brought the small ones home.  Still, he had to admit that the simple repair and painting jobs did a lot to make things look a hell of a lot better.  

  

It wasn't long after Dean felt his pups first flutters that Cas could feel them too.  Cas had been fascinated with Dean's growing stomach since it was just a small, almost unnoticeable bump.  But now, being able to feel the pup's flutters and kicks and occasional elbow, just enhanced and encouraged Cas' attention.  He was entirely content lying on the couch while Dean watched TV, touching and talking to Dean's stomach.   It was adorable.   

One night, the content omega reminded him that he needed attention too, laughing as Cas waited with his ear to Dean's stomach for a reply to an earlier question.  Castiel had read that babies could hear when they were in the womb and could even recognize voices, so he spoke to them often, holding one sided conversations with Dean's belly.   

“So you need attention too, love?” Cas purred, as he looked up, placing a soft kiss to Dean's stomach. Dean had given up on wearing a shirt when at home since his pup's kept his body temperature on the warm side and his alpha pulled it off him at every given chance.  

“I do.” Dean answered mischievously, grabbing his alpha by the collar and dragging him up for a real kiss.  

Their kisses quickly grew heated. Dean had not lied when he said he needed attention too. It had been way to long since they had made love to one another. Mostly because they had been so busy with the house, but a small part because Dean felt insecure about his changing body. He knew Castiel loved the way he looked, but he was not entirely on board with it.  

“Come on alpha, let’s move this to the bedroom.” Dean gasped as he could smell the intoxicating smell of aroused alpha.  

Cas followed him more than willingly, barely making it inside the bedroom before Dean had him pushed against the wall, opening his pants with skilled fingers, grabbing the pulsing erection through the thin fabric of his boxers. Cas moaned softly at the feeling.  

“Need you alpha.” He panted against his lips, moving his hand in slow, teasing movements.  

Dean was not embarrassed in the least when Cas dragged him closer to find his pants soaked through with slick. Looking at Castiel he only saw a slim line of blue around his lust-blown pupils.  

In seconds they were both naked with Dean spread out on the bed, head and upper back propped up on pillows, his alpha hovering over him.  He wondered if his stomach would soon be too big for this kind of activity, but at that moment he could think of nothing more sexy than the view of his alpha as he lowered his head between Dean's legs.  

"You are beautiful Dean."  Cas stated as he slowly kissed and rubbed his cheeks against Dean's inner thighs and belly.   

Castiel did not waste too much time teasing though, instead he licked up Dean's cock and swallowed it down.  Dean was unable to stay still on the mattress, hips moving up to greet his alpha's mouth on their own accord.  His head felt clouded with arousal as he was sucked quickly to the edge orgasm by an eager mouth.  

“Not gonna last.” Dean panted.  

“You are not supposed to.” Cas told him, lips moving against his shaft along with soft, teasing kisses. “Do you want to feel me inside of you? Feel me fill you up good, huh?” Dean moaned as Cas continued to tease his dickhead with his tongue.  

“Yes please alpha.” He begged. “Please.”  

“Then you must hold back until I am ready to take you.” Cas sent him a teasing smile before swallowing him down again, gently pushing one, then two fingers into his wet entrance. Dean bucked up, gasping for air as Cas brushed against his prostate, the want to orgasm suddenly intensified.  

“You are not aaah...” Dean protested “making it easy…”  

His alpha answered by keeping his mouth on his cock and pushing in three fingers, slowly and deliberately, making sure Dean felt every inch of the gentle stretch. It was still not enough to satisfy the omega's need to be filled.  He wanted more.  Hell, Dean loved blowjobs, but feeling Cas inside him? It was in an entirely different league.   

He could hear himself whimper, no longer able to form a sentence or even a one word plea.   

Fingers where withdrawn slowly. “Roll over, on your side. Yes. Just like that. You are so good for me. So beautiful my omega.”  

Dean moaned softly as Cas pressed his body up against his back, hand pushing his thigh up and forward, so he could begin to slowly push inside him. They had made love spooning before, and there was something about his alpha curled around him while fucking him, that Dean absolutely loved.  

It took an embarrassingly short amount of time before the omega was spilling over himself and the sheets, Cas easily nailing his prostate with each thrust. Cas followed shortly after, the feeling of Dean clenching around him too intense, too much to hold back from.  

Dean was happy.  He was also sated from an outstandingly good fuck.   

He fell asleep to Cas softly kissing his neck and shoulders, a hand around his stomach.  

 

It was the rumbling of his stomach and the smell of hungry alpha that woke him up. They were no longer knotted together, but Cas had not moved an inch and was still pressed against his back.  

“Hungry.” Dean mumbled, tiredly rubbing his eyes.  

“I ordered Indian takeout.” Cas told him. Alright, so Cas had moved.  Dean noticed that he had been cleaned up, the evidence of their lovemaking no longer on his belly or between his legs.  Dean smiled at the thought of his alpha getting up to take care of him, then returning to spoon up against him as he woke up.    

“Have I mentioned that I fucking love you?” Dean turned around so that he could kiss his blue-eyed alpha.  

“Once or twice in the past if I recall correctly.” Cas agreed. “I love you too.”  

  

They continued to steadily work on their new house so that it would be as ready as possible for their move-in date. As December progressed and his belly grew, Dean was mostly reduced to cooking or buying the stuff needed for the repairs, much to his annoyance. At the same time he was very grateful that his family wanted to help out so much. More than once it resulted in him being moved to tears, even though he would cover it by blaming it on the sand or dust in the air getting into his eyes. Nobody was fooled by that.   

Christmas also came much too quickly, Cas and Dean having to be reminded of the upcoming event by Sam.  Both looking shocked by the realization that Christmas was only one week away.  Later that day, Gabe approached Dean and offered to host what he termed, "the annual family Christmas dinner" to help out, but Dean refused with a smile.  Although he could not explain it verbally, in his heart Dean knew that hosting dinner was a way he could show appreciation to his family for giving him so much.  Gabe had just shrugged congenially at his refusal and returned to the living room.  Cas, Sam, Bobby, and Jody were already there, sitting on the floor waiting for pizza delivery.   Dean took a moment to simply watch.  Standing in his new home filled with the people he loved most in the world, Dean realized how much his life had changed in just two short years.  He went from having almost nothing to having everything he had ever dreamed of.   Rubbing his hands over his stomach, he smiled at his alpha when he looked up and caught his eye.   

Dean was happy.   

 

Although the week leading up to Christmas had been a bit stressful due to last minute meal preparations and Christmas shopping, Christmas day was peaceful and everything Dean wanted.  Dean was kind enough to offer to include Chuck in their family Christmas dinner, but after much internal debate Cas decided not to extend an invitation.  Although he had met again with Chuck over coffee and talked to him a few times on the phone, he was not family.  At least not yet.  Cas was still unsure about including his father in his life again.  But as Dean pointed out, Chuck was out of his life for over 15 years so there was no reason Cas had to rush to make a decision.  As he surveyed the people sitting down at his table for Christmas dinner, Cas realized that his omega was right.  His family was here and it was perfect.   

To Dean's chagrin, he got a lot of maternity pants as Christmas gifts.  Mostly jeans with stretch panels, but he got khaki pants as well.  Everyone had heard him complaining about having to wear sweatpants all the time.  Although Dean was a usual t-shirt and jeans kind of guy, being limited in his wardrobe really sucked.  Besides pants, Charlie had also gifted him a nice, maternity button-down shirt so he had something to go with his new khakis if he needed a more formal outfit.  Sam and Jess had also bought Dean several t-shirts with extra room for his stomach. Cas loved those as they hugged Deans body in a way that showed off his toned arms and made it obvious that he was pregnant, not “fucking fat” as Dean liked to put it.  

“Oh god Gabe. If we eat all that cake all of us will look like Dean before the day is over.” Sam gaped over the amount of cakes and sweets that Gabriel had brought.  

“Hey!” Dean complained from the other side of the room, sending Sam an offended look.  

“It is not like the cake dies from being left for tomorrow.” Gabriel shrugged with a smile on his face. “But hey, Dean-o is eating for three, so he gets to eat the most, right?”  

 “Still. This is a lot.”  

Gabriel just laughed, sending Sam a bright smile before moving to the kitchen to help Castiel with his new coffee-machine. Gabriel had given the soon-to-be parents a new machine as he had grown tired of hearing Cas complaining about Dean’s.   

With cake and coffee in hand, everyone withdrew to the living room to talk and relax.  

“It is so weird… Next Christmas, we are going to have two new family members.” Charlie smiled, nodding towards Dean, who was relaxing on the sofa with his feet propped up on the coffee table.  

“Mmhmm.” Dean agreed. “I am really looking forward to meeting the pups. I am pretty sure that even though they are twins, each is going to be very unique.”  

“How so?” Charlie asked.  

“Well, left-twin kicks a shit ton more than right-twin. He or she mostly moves when I am relaxing or drinking something hot or cold. Or if Cas is talking. That is funny, because his voice seems to settle Lefty, whereas Righty moves when he talks.” Dean explained.  

“So you can feel them move now?” Sam starred at Dean with awe, like the movement of his babies was a miracle.  

“Yes. You could too, if you were touching my stomach.”  

“Can I?” His younger brother turned his puppy eyes towards Dean who nodded, knowing that it was likely that the rest of his company would also want to touch his stomach. 

As it turned out, Dean was right.  Gabe, Jody, Charlie, Jess, and Bobby all took turns touching his stomach.  Had it not been his family Dean might have found it disturbing and very uncomfortable to be touched by so many people, but it was actually quite enjoyable.  He felt treasured.  The pups, in turn, seemed excited to say hello, like they knew that their family wanted to feel them.  Waiting until last, surprisingly Bobby was the most interactive during his turn.  He kneeled down and cupped his hands around the front of Dean's stomach.  After introducing himself as Grandpa, he started listing all the stuff he was going to teach each pup to do regardless of their gender.  When the pups started kicking in earnest each time their Grandpa spoke, Dean could see Bobby's guardedness, his past pain, slip away with each kick.   The rest of the family seemed also to realize the enormity of the moment as the room became silent.   

"Here's the one thing I need you to always believe," Bobby started, "family don't end in blood.  Your daddy is my son and you are my grandpups.  You are my family.  And I will love you and protect you until the day I die."   

Standing up and surveying the room and the people in it, Bobby took a deep, shaky breath and continued, "Ya'all should know that you are included in that.  You are my family too."   

Before anyone could respond, Bobby smiled mischievously and stated, "But only Dean is getting a hug." Tension broken, laughter filled the air as Dean was caught up in Bobby's embrace.   

"No fair!  Group hug!" Gabe exclaimed, hugging the side of Bobby and Dean as their other family member's joined in as well, cocooning Dean in a bubble of joy and love.       

Dean was happy.  So, so, so happy.   

 


	9. Chucky times

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas have yet to figure out what the hell to do with his dad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, I am sorry that the updates are slower than I have made you guys used too. Currently my life is trying to screw itself over, meaning that I either take it out with writing or that I do not write at all. Hope you guys are well and still enjoying the story <3
> 
> LadyHawke72 has again made a wonderful job with this. It feels like I am writing something alright-ish, and then she makes it all worth reading. I could not wish for a better beta.

It was late January before Castiel scheduled another meeting with Chuck.  The alpha was a new kind of exhausted as he entered his coffee shop.  Dean had broken down the night before, crying and completely unable to verbalize what the was going on inside his head.  It took almost an hour of Cas holding and rocking him gently before the omega was calm enough to admit that he was upset about the lack of closets in their new home.   Most of their clothing was still in suitcases and boxes as they had originally agreed that other home repair and renovations took priority.  Or at least Cas thought they had agreed.  He found himself at a total loss for what to do as Dean explained how he wasn't a good father because he hadn't bought the twins basic furniture to hold their clothes and toys.  Trying to explain reasonably that newborn pups surely did not give a fuck about clothes much less if they were hung in a closet or folded in a suitcase, surprisingly did not turn out so good for Cas.  It took another few hours of apologies, cuddling, and promises of weekend furniture shopping to coax his omega back to better spirits and to bed to finally sleep.   

Hell, Cas was so exhausted that he had considered calling Chuck to reschedule.   But at the same time he knew that he had already pushed this meeting off for too long and ultimately he needed to come to a decision.  He chose to meet Chuck for coffee again,  this time though at his own shop.  He knew it was his way of sharing with his father part of his life.  Share something he was immensely proud of.  The shop was something he built from the ground up and at times he doubted if it would ever succeed.  But now it earned a nice profit from the rare book collections alone, the fact that most of the students from the nearby university bought coffee while hanging and studying was a bonus. While he tried to tell himself that his father’s opinion did not mean anything to him, part of him still used his extra time to dust off what little, invisible dust there could be and to make sure the spines on the books aligned.   He wiped down the tables and glass countertops and restocked the coffee supplies.  He liked it neat. He liked it clean. It had nothing to do with Chuck visiting.  

Cas knew he was also nervous because he was still confused by Chuck’s reentry into his life.  Although Chuck had not pressured him, it was easy to sense that he was waiting for Cas to say or do something.  To welcome him back to the family or to disown him all together.   Cas had talked a lot with Dean and Gabriel and even made a few appointments with Benny to try and figure out what he should do.   They were patient as he tried to talk through his conflicting emotions, but ultimately even Dean said he needed to make the decision himself.   

Dean was more decisive about Chuck's involvement with the twins though and they both agreed not to introduce Chuck to the twins until he had shown consistency in staying part of Cas' life.  Chuck was bipolar and that would never change.  It would not just go away with medication.   At points in his life Chuck had been suicidal and unable to care for himself.  Chuck could become that way again.  Did Cas really want that type of instability in his life?  The pups had a grandfather, they had Bobby. They also had uncles and aunts and he felt pretty damned sure that there would be cousins at some point too.   The twins had family, a loving, caring mentally functional family.  Was it really in the best interest of the twins to introduce them to a grandfather that may leave or commit suicide?   On the other hand, what if Chuck could manage his illness?  Cas had wonderful childhood memories of Chuck.  He had been an amazing father.  Attentive, loving, supportive.  Was it fair to keep his children from a loving grandfather?  Was it fair not to give Chuck another chance?  Cas had no idea and it seemed that no one else had an answer for him either.  

 

There were a few other customers in the shop and Cas had busied himself making coffee when Chuck arrived. It was not his shift, there was another barista working, but he found it calming to brew espressos and foam milk.  

“Hello, father.” Cas send him what he hoped was a friendly smile.  

“Hey Castiel.” Chuck answered, looking around at the place. “So this is where you work?” 

“I own it.” He corrected, drying his hands off on a towel before stepping out from behind the counter.  

“Yes, I can see your mark here. This is… This reminds me a lot of your room.” Chuck admitted. “Except for the coffee. You weren’t drinking coffee back then. But the aura it has. The books.  Cozy but immaculately clean. It's you.  I like it. I see why the students like to go here.  Why it’s the number one source of rare books.” 

Cas looked at him with surprise in his blue eyes.  

“I have done my homework.” Chuck admitted, hopeful glean in his eyes. He seemed more collected this visit.  Calmer. 

“I can tell that. Do you want some coffee?” He offered, shifting from one foot to another. He had googled Chuck too, read parts of his book.  The explanation Chuck had given about the missing years seemed consistent with what he could find. Meg was indeed a psychiatric nurse, her graduation picture and professional accomplishments online if you searched long enough and knew her full, legal name.  But like many people, Cas never got past her modeling shots or the stories linking Meg and Chuck as a couple.  Upset by his father’s abandonment, it was too easy for Cas  to believe the worst. 

“Yes please.” 

“Any preferences?” Cas asked, tilting his head ever so slightly.  

“No, you just make whatever you feel like.” Chuck told him. As Cas walked behind the counter to make their coffee, Chuck grabbed them a table.  

It did not take him long to make two cups of warm, heavenly goodness. Cas needed the caffeine as much as he needed to hold on to something, and if things got too difficult (which he hoped they would not, hence the choice of location) he could get up and make them another cup of coffee. He just wanted to get to know his father without a load of emotions getting in the way. 

“I like your mate. Dean, right?” Chuck started out the conversation. “Is he getting big now?”  

“Yes. It is not long until his due date.” Cas softened up a little, feeling the tension leaving his shoulders as he thought about his mate and their pups.  

“You really love him.” His father stated. “I like seeing you so happy.”  

“He does make me very happy.” The younger alpha admitted, running a hand through his hair which seemed to make it more not less ruffled. “You don’t mind me being with another man?”  

“No. Should I?” 

“It is just… Michael and Raphael are very… very old fashioned about that.” Cas stated, again dragging a hand through his now messy hair. 

“Yes.” Chuck sighed. “They are. I suppose that is my fault too, not raising them to accept love in all forms and shapes.  Your mother raised them in a traditional church where homosexuality was shunned.  Looked upon as a sin.  I had hoped that they would broaden their views as they got older and experienced more of the world, but instead they became more rigid in their beliefs.  It did not help that the doctor treating your mother when she died was openly gay.  It simply gave them more reason to hate." 

“It did.” Cas agreed, wondering why Gabriel had not chosen the path of anger. His brother had not been old enough to know his sexuality at that point, barely more than a kid.  Maybe he had simply been too young.  Or maybe some people were just born intrinsically good.   

“I am sorry that it made things more difficult for you.” Chuck interrupted his thoughts, eyes wide and imploring.  "I let you down in so many ways.  Let all of you down by not being there."  

“That blame is not on you, father.” Castiel assured him.  He could not find it in himself to blame his dad for his older brother's intolerance.  He had nightmares about losing Dean in childbirth.  How would he cope with his grief while taking care of two newborns?  And Chuck not only had to care for newborns, but his three older children as well.  All while grieving the death of his wife and dealing with his bipolar disorder.  No, Cas did not blame his father for his brothers being homophobic bigots. That was on them.  

To avoid saying anything he started to drink his coffee, when one question suddenly hit him.  

“How did you find out that I had mated? And about Dean being pregnant?” He asked, head tilting again.  

Chuck hesitated for just a little too long, eyes diverted, like he was considering how to answer.  

“I stalked your Facebook. You are together in your profile picture and your mating marks are pretty obvious.” A smile spread across his face. “And when I learned about Dean's blog, I started following him.  That is how I learned that he was pregnant…”  

It occurred to Castiel that this was the first time he felt sure that he had caught Chuck in a lie. The pause had not been necessary, the extra breath not needed. They had not been talking about something difficult. He did not believe his father.  

“Sure father.” Cas could not help the cold in his voice, the hint of disappointment. Chuck wanted to be trusted, wanted to be part of Cas' life.  So why the lie?  That seemed like a bad foundation to build a new relationship on and Cas would not allow it.  

“So truthfully, how did you find out?”  

Another hesitation. Chuck moved uncomfortably in his seat.  

“Gabriel told me.” The older alpha whispered to the table top after another moment of hesitation.  

Cas could almost feel the blood leave his face. “Gabriel?” he repeated.  

“Yes. We talk.” 

“How long?”   

Chuck swallowed. “Well, for years.  When I first left I think he hoped it would be temporary and he was in constant contact begging me to come home.  But after I was institutionalized, I think he realized how serious my illness was and he took over your care.  We went a long time without any contact.  But it was Meg who encouraged me to get back in touch once I was stable and managing my illness.  At first, he sent me simple updates or an occasional photo.  But a few texts became emails.  And emails became phone calls.  In the last few years, we talked frequently and he has visited me several times.  He has even been to a few therapy sessions with me.  And since you moved in with Dean we talk almost weekly.  Gabriel has always been the one who kept me updated on how you were doing.”  

“He wouldn’t do that. You. Are. Lying." Cas yelled, as he towered over Chuck, chair toppled to the side in his haste to stand up, index finger accentuating each word with a poke to Chuck's chest.   

“Calm down Castiel.” Chuck ordered.  Cas growled as his hands fisted.  “You are scaring your customers.”   

That gave Cas pause.  He stood up straight and looked around.   Scent of angry alpha permeated the small shop and customers stilled in shock as they watched the interaction between the two men.  One customer had his phone out filming.  His morning shift barista stood behind the counter, mouth open, completely ignoring the overflowing cups behind him.   

“I will be back in a moment.” Cas stalked to the luckily unoccupied bathroom, as customers hurried to get out of his way, and locked the door behind him.  He tried to calm himself with the breathing techniques he had learned in therapy.  He splashed ice-cold water in his face.  When none of that fully worked, he looked through pictures of Dean on his phone until he finally felt his blood cool and his scent dissipate.    

 Castiel had no desire to be one of those angry, knot headed alphas and took pride in being calm in most situations.  Losing control like that shamed him.  But the thought of Gabriel lying to him left him bone-rattling angry. Gabriel had never told him about keeping in contact with Chuck. Never even mentioned their father if he could avoid it.  

But again, the actions of his brother were not Chuck'a fault.   

Chuck was still at their table and had refilled their coffee when Cas returned.  He looked imploringly at Cas, but did not say a word.  He simply waited for Cas to chose how the visit would end.  He seemed almost relieved when Cas changed topics and began to tell him about the difficulties of being mated to a  stubborn omega who wanted to be hands on with house renovation, yet was restricted by his pregnancy and ever growing belly.   

“And he does not trust me to paint a wall.” Cas sighed, smiling. “I mean, if I allowed him to he would do everything himself.”  

“You could have chosen a more pliant, submissive mate.” Chuck joked. “But then again, you were never one to back down from a challenge.”  

They managed to enjoy the rest of the visit, Chuck leaving a short time later with a promise to call.    Chuck was a lot like Cas remembered.  Engaged, attentive, proud.  It was....nice.   He liked having this version of his father in his life again.   

But even as his feelings toward Chuck began to soften, Cas could feel the anger simmering underneath his skin.  Gabriel had kept his contact with Chuck hidden all those years.  His brother had known that his father was sick and had not just abandoned him.  He wanted to interrogate Chuck about Gabriel's actions, but knew that it was not the time, nor the place for that type of talk. His earlier behavior was proof of that.  No the talk he needed to have with his father and brother required privacy.  It might also require a therapist.  And his mate, most definitely his mate.   

 

Dean instantly had his arms around Cas as soon as he entered their home.  Cas remembered reading that omegas were more in tune with their mate's needs during pregnancy.  The theory being that providing for their alpha would make the alpha more likely to take care for the omega and their children in turn.  Not that the reason really mattered, he was just happy to hug Dean, breathe in the calming scent of mate, home, pups with a hint of motor oil and everything he found good in this world.  

Dean did not ask for an explanation for his alpha's mood and seemed to simply accept that Cas needed comfort while he processed his thoughts and emotions.  Instead he curled up on the couch with Cas, a bowl of popcorn, and Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince on the television.  Cas put his ear to Dean's chest, listening to the steady sound of his heartbeat while caressing his stomach, the twins giving the occasional poke with a foot or elbow.  Cas knew he had to confront Gabriel soon, but tonight, tonight he was simply going to enjoy being in the arms of his mate.  Cas fell asleep less than halfway through the movie and if the twins noted that their carrier Dad ate all the popcorn, they did not say a word.  


	10. The Whale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Double babies means double scans

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We can pretend that I am a nice writer for a little while longer.

Okay, Dean was not one to complain about getting extra scans to prove that their babies were growing well. But at 32 weeks pregnant he felt like a fucking waddling whale trying to move.  So maybe he did complain when he needed to go somewhere.  Anywhere really. He had long given up on gracefulness, he was just happy when he managed to get around. Getting in and out of the impala without help had been difficult enough from week 28, but after their last scan he was starting to find it nearly impossible. Cas had moved his shifts so he could drive Dean to and from work and to his appointments with Donna.  Dean was glad that he had an alpha willing to help the way he did, but he fucking missed being independent.  

So with his alpha in hand he waddled into Donna's waiting-room for his 32 week scan, early as always. Cas had brought a book on the early years of childhood and development or whatever. Dean had not really cared when his alpha enthusiastically (behind the wheel of _his_ baby) told him about the book. Honestly, he had been too busy sulking about not being the one driving.  The omega very much missed being able to get behind the wheel of his baby and drive much less all the help he now needed simply getting in and out of a car. It was fucking great to be pregnant, he thought, looking down at his swollen belly. He loved the new life developing in there, loved his kids already, but he really missed the glowing feeling that the internet had promised him. He felt like a lot of things, but a glowing ball of pure happiness was so not on the list.  He missed being able to do his job. Bobby would not let him near cars and instead he had to put up with fucking deskwork, making sure that there were enough supplies in stock and that the bills were being paid. That type of work did not suit him what so ever, though he had to admit that his lower back and feet appreciated the chance to work from a sitting position. His feet would swell like sausages if he stood on his feet too much during the day. Being able to reach things without his stomach getting in the way would also not be missed or needing to pee every other damned minute.  

Not that he felt 100% ready to give birth no matter how many pregnancy caused complaints he had.  It was fucking terrifying, knowing that he would be a parent after that. He was already, kind of, making sure that he did everything to keep them happy and safe while in his belly, but once they were out? Once they were two fucking individuals who would grow up with hopes and dreams?  That was scary to think about. What if he screwed them over? What if he was a horrible father? 

Oh, and then there was the great matter of getting the twins out of him. At the start of his pregnancy, that had seemed like the scariest part. Cas had looked up a video of natural home birth, promising Dean it was beautiful and magical. What Dean saw was two melons being pushed out of someone’s privates covered in blood and water and fucking gore. Well, at this point he was starting to feel so heavy, so uncomfortable, that he was more than ready to push out melons from whatever opening in his body if that meant he could get back his normal, functional, somewhat graceful body. 

Dean sighed in frustration and looked over at his alpha.  Cas had his nose in the baby book, brow scrunched together in concentration, lips moving silently as he read.   

Dean smiled.   

So OK, there were perks to being pregnant. For one thing, he no longer needed the coffee-table when watching anything from the sofa. His stomach did a fine job holding his plate.  And his alpha was pretty amazing and attentive.  Softly he planted a hand on his stomach and caressed it. Since Cas wanted to touch his tummy as often as possible, Dean had convinced him to rub in pregnancy creams to hopefully prevent stretch marks. Cas had taken it to a whole other level, making pregnancy body-butter himself with natural remedies, insisting that it was better for Dean, the pups and his skin.  His tummy massages often led to more intimate all over body massages.  Did Dean mention that a perk of being pregnant was how sensitive his body felt?  How horny Cas could get him with simple touches?  How he could orgasm with nipple play alone...or how much more intense his orgasms were.....or.... 

“Dean? Cas?” Donna interrupted Dean's inappropriate thoughts as she smiled broadly and led them back for their scan.  

“So how are we feeling today?” She asked, closing the door after them.  

“Horn...I mean heavy.” Dean responded, blushing at his slip up, as he climbed up on the examination table with help (of fucking course) from Cas.  

“Well, most people feel like that at this stage of the pregnancy.” Donna assured him. “Even the ones only carrying one pup.  You will feel heavier though.” She winked towards Dean who moaned theatrically. He was so not looking forward to that and at the same time, he wanted the babies to stay in his belly for as long as possible. The longer they managed to do so, the better.  

He was so not getting used to the cold gel used for the ultrasound either.  

“Does it have to feel like you are squirting soft-ice on my stomach each time?”  

Both Donna and Cas laughed at that.   Dean was happy to make his alpha laugh even if it was at his own expense.   

It seemed that the alpha was more worried and stressed than Dean at each ultrasound appointment. Even though everything was progressing normally, Dean still recognized the tenseness in his Cas' posture.  Donna had even tested him for gestational diabetes because Cas had read about it and suddenly saw symptoms everywhere. Dean had so not been happy about missing his breakfast until Donna stated he did not have the pregnancy caused complication.  The smell of relieved alpha was so strong that it almost caused him to cry.    

Slowly Dean stroked the back of Cas’ hand with his thumb as Donna moved the transducer over his stomach.  

“There we have twin left.” She announced, all happy smiles, letting the two men have a look at one of their pups before moving on to take measurements.   

“Lefty seems to have grown perfectly fine. It is normal in twin pregnancies that the growth slows down a little around this time because of the restricted space in Dean's uterus. They will however continue to grow.” She told them before moving the transducer, trying to find twin right. It took quite a while longer.  

“There we have the other one. If you are looking close, you can see Righty behind Lefty?” She pointed towards the screen. Dean squinted but found it difficult to make out the difference between the grey blobs, whereas Cas nodded as he saw exactly what Donna was referring to.   

Liar.  

“Did you know that your babies are now able to hear and see?” She told them, while giving them time to look at the grey blobs that were their pups. “They will be able to recognize your voices when delivered.” When she continued to take the measurements, her smile diminished a little. 

“Donna, is anything wrong?” Cas quickly picked up her slight change in mood. 

“No, not really Castiel.” She turned her gaze towards him, smiling reassuring. “Twin right is just smaller than twin left, which is completely normal.”  

“Why do you look worried?”  

Donna sighed. “I am not, not really. But to be perfectly honest, the difference is a little more than I would prefer it to be.” She answered the worried alpha. “Righty has developed and grown since the last scan, so there is most likely nothing to worry about. As I said, it is normal that there is a difference in size for twins, but I would like you to come back in two weeks, just to make sure that both of your pups grow like they are supposed to.”  

Then, quickly before Cas started to worry too much, she was all smiles and “Who wants to hear heartbeats?”, connecting the Doppler and soon, the room was soon filled with the galloping sounds of fetal heartbeat.  

It was obviously having the effect on Cas that she wanted. “You can hear how strong the heart is, right? This is Righty’s heartbeat.” She kept the alpha’s gaze while letting him listen to the sound.  

“Want to hear Lefty’s too?” Not waiting for an answer, she moved the Doppler, easily finding the other heartbeat. “Your babies are healthy, Castiel. It is perfectly normal in twins to have a size difference, I just want to make sure that both gain weight like they are supposed to. It is nothing to worry about.”  

She let the sound play out into the room until Dean sensed Cas had calmed down. The news about the twin’s different sizes seemed to upset the alpha so much more. Maybe it had something to do with Dean carrying them. He was able to feel them moving, feel them whenever he had worries. Cas couldn't.  So Dean let him dry off the ultrasound gel while Donna loaded the most recent pictures on a CD for them to bring home. 

She then proceeded to take Dean’s blood pressure (normal too) while asking about their new house. Dean let Castiel do the talking about the nursery, playroom and how the garden would come together in the spring.  He watched happily as his alpha relaxed even further as he talked about how the kids would love to sleep outside in their stroller while he planted onions and potatoes.  

After Dean was standing up again (with help of course), they thanked Donna, got their usual hugs (Donna had been the first non-family person Dean had felt safe hugging) and were scheduled for another ultrasound two weeks. Dean could not have wished for a better doctor or the extra insurance coverage Cas' business provided him. He knew high risk pregnancies were costly and he didn't have more than basic insurance until mating Cas.  He knew that Donna would have treated him regardless, but it was nice no longer having to worry about money.   

He was happy that he had an alpha who was so engaged in his pregnancy.  Not all omegas were so lucky.  As Cas helped him into the impala, Dean realized that no matter how much he hated that he needed the help, he was glad that he had Cas to help him.  Cas was always just there, knowing what he needed, holding out a hand without judgment.  

Turning his head, he smiled towards the blue-eyed man behind the wheel of his baby. Soon there would be two babies in his baby. It was one hell of a weird thought.  

“I love you, Cas.” 

“I love you too, Dean.”  

And for a moment, everything was perfect.  

 


	11. The baby shower

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean needs his fucking sleep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the amount of time this took me to get up. I have just started a new job, and have been quite exhausted because of that
> 
> Hope you are still with me, hope you like this chapter too!

Dean had known something was wrong as soon as Cas returned home from his meeting with Chuck. He had done his best to comfort and soothe his alpha but days later Cas was still troubled.  Knowing that his alpha liked to take time to think through his problems, Dean had not pressed, had not asked any questions.  He had just been there.  Hopefully providing a calming balm to his alpha's agitated mind.  

Dean wondered if Cas' troubles had something to do with Gabriel, given how Cas' scent became sour when Dean had suggested inviting their brothers over for Sunday lunch.  Cas had claimed that they needed to let their brothers have a weekend off from helping them with their home improvement projects, but Dean did not necessarily believe him.  Cas was obviously stressed the fuck out.    

The stress made his alpha annoying to be around and almost impossible as fuck to sleep beside with his constant turning and signing.  Dean swore he could even hear Cas grinding his teeth at night.   The twins were partying under his skin as well, so sleep was starting to become something the omega rarely got.  It did not help that besides being sleep deprived, Dean was overwhelmed with fucking pregnancy hormones and suffering from sharp jabs of pain in the weirdest places.  Although he rationally knew that Cas' stress had nothing to do with him, emotionally he worried that Cas was unhappy with him.   But the omega soldiered on.  Cas had been his rock, offering his unwavering love and support when Dean needed him the most, so he swore to do the same.  In the very least Dean decided he would stop complaining about trivial things like storage or paint colors or about his pregnancy aches and pains.  He wanted to decrease not add to his alpha's stress levels.      

Seeing the twins on their 32 week scan had helped his alpha's mood quite a bit. Even though Cas worried in the days leading up to each scan, he became a happy ball of relief in the days after.   It helped tremendously that everything was good with the twins.  Both were healthy and progressing normally.  The placentas were placed fine and Dean showed no signs of going into early labor. Heck, Donna had even called Dean a textbook worthy example of a healthy, male omega pregnancy.   

 

Given the uptick in his alpha's mood, maybe Dean should not have been surprised to be greeted to an entire living room of balloons when he entered their new home.  Cas had convinced him to accompany him while he ran a few errands.  Dean had been content enough to simply enjoy the ride in the Impala.  It was a beautiful day and even if he wasn't driving he still enjoyed spending time in his baby.  He should have smelled the set up.   

Sam dangled an extra key between his fingers with a mischievous grin as the rest of Dean's family crowded around to greet him.  Dean was 33 weeks pregnant and was “way fucking overdue!” for a baby shower according to Charlie as she plastered herself to his side.  With the help of their family, Cas and Dean had been renovating their house through December, January and February.  Even though they had moved in the first of January, they did not have a housewarming party. There had been too much to do, too much to think about, too little time.  

Apparently their family and friends disagreed and had decided to throw the couple a housewarming slash baby shower.  Sam had borrowed their extra house key a few days before, asking Dean if he could have a box or two of old study books he had kept stored at their place. 

“You are such a liar!” Dean complained while hugging Sam as close as his stomach allowed him to. He missed real hugs instead of the awkward watermelon-in-the-way squeezes. 

“Yeah.” Sam grinned, looking way too happy with how things had turned out. “But you would not have let us plan it any other way. ‘sides, Cas agreed to it and helped with the guest list.” 

“Oh really.” Dean glared towards his alpha who tried very hard to look innocent. “So this was why you insisted I go with you to do "errands"?” 

Cas nodded as Dean's vision suddenly became clouded with red hair and a wide smile. Charlie kissed his cheek.  “Stop grumping.  You love this.” She told him and he had to agree.  

Okay, maybe not the excessive amounts of balloons, but all the rest. For so long love had not been a part of his vocabulary towards anyone but Sam and there he was, loved from head to toes.  

Charlie grabbed him by the wrist and dragged him into the kitchen where a fucking mountain of presents awaited him together with his other guests.  Gabriel, Jessica, Jody, Bobby, and even Garth and Victor, a few of the guys from the garage.  He managed to give all awkward hugs when he noticed both Donna and Benny were present as well.  Both looked a little awkward though, standing off to the side, as if they were unsure of their welcome.  Dean realized that it might be unusual or even considered inappropriate to be friends with two people who had intimate knowledge of his psychological and medical history, but after a moment of contemplation Dean decided he did not care.   He trusted both Benny and Donna.  Neither ever judged him.  Both had helped him tremendously in becoming the man he was today.  He was glad they were there.    

Smiling brightly, Dean opened his arms in greeting to Donna, who looked smoking hot with her hair down.  Dean noticed he wasn't the only one who appreciated the blonde doctor's appearance as he turned to greet Benny. 

"How's it going brother?" Benny asked after hugging Dean and shaking hands with Cas. 

“Good, except these little bastards like to keep me up at night.” Dean pointed towards his stomach.  

That made him laugh.  

Gabriel interrupted by announcing very loudly that it was cake time.  

The cake was another of Gabriel's  amazing creations. It was white chocolate, raspberry and licorice. The decorations where simple and sweet without being stereotypical pink and blue baby themed.  Gabriel's personality could be overwhelming, but he was subtle in his decorating.  Confident that his baking spoke for itself.   

“Cas texted me about your weird licorice cravings.” Gabe told Dean when he gave him the first slice.   

“Yeah.” He agreed, mouth watering as he brought a bite of cake to his mouth.  It was good.  Better than good, Dean decided as he hummed around a mouthful. 

Garth, one of the guys from the garage, sat down beside him. At first Dean had not liked the peculiar man, but with time he had grown on him.  

“How does it feel to be pregnant?” The slimmer man asked, digging into his cake.  

“Weird.” He answered, shrugging. “Really weird. I am an incubator for two individual lives.  I'm as big as a whale, my body has changed, my scent has changed.  I can't work or do things around the house.  I get weird mood swings and cravings.”  

“That sounds annoying.”  

“Can be.” Dean agreed. “I had Cas drive out in the middle of the night because my entire body started demanding Doritos with cream cheese. Don’t ask me why. It tastes horrible, but I kept eating it anyway.”  

"Ewwwww," Garth responded in agreement, "Still, you are creating life and that must make all this weird stuff worth it."   

Dean smiled down at his belly, which was holding his cake plate securely (put portable table top on the plus side of pregnancy).   "Yup, totally worth it." 

After cake-time it was present-time.  Dean still disliked being the center of attention, so he did everything possible to get people to stare at the gifts instead of him.  Donna, Charlie, Jody, and Benny had all decided on being practical, so their gifts included lots of diapers, one-pieces, bath toys, blankets, and an awesome diaper-bag. Sam and Jessica had gotten them frames and a gift-card for photography (“We should get some with you being pregnant as well Dean!” Cas had decided), and Gabriel had bought “best daddy” and “best papa” tees for him and Cas. He had also included a homemade I-make-food-for-your-freezer card for the first few months. Bobby, with the help of Garth and Victor, had built mini-impala strollers.  They looked like regular strollers with a handle for Dean or Cas to push, but as Bobby quickly demonstrated, also could be converted to a play car when the babies were old enough to play and push on their own.   

Dean started crying when he learned that the men had used several of their weekends to make the strollers.  And so what if he shed some very manly tears? Or if he was honest, more manly tears.  He had started tearing up after the first gift and hadn't dried up yet.  Needless to say, Dean was fucking overwhelmed by the love and thought put into the baby shower and all of the gifts.  

They ordered pizza for dinner, agreeing that since the baby presents had been opened, it was officially a housewarming party instead.  Sam presented Dean and Cas a card signed by everyone with a $250 gift card to Home Depot inside of it.   

Their family was fucking awesome.  

  

February bled into march, and Soon Dean entered his 34 week. That meant, going by the average pregnancy length for twins, that he could meet his babies in under a month. Freaking terrifying. Freaking exiting.  Saturday, the day after their 34 week scan, had started out great.  Their happiness had led to both of them getting a full restful night's sleep and sleeping in, waking all warm and tangled together.  Dean had been the big spoon until Cas complained about the twins kicking him in the back.  They readjusted and morning cuddles led to morning handjobs, both coming within seconds of each other.   Deciding to shower together so Cas could help Dean wash all his now hard to reach areas, led to Dean's second orgasm as Cas gave him a sloppy, but decidingly effective blowjob.  The pampering continued as Cas insisted Dean sit on the couch and relax with his feet up while he brewed a pot of decaffeinated coffee and made a simple breakfast.  For the next few hours they had simply cuddled on the couch, mindlessly watching television, while Cas rubbed the arches of Dean's swollen feet.  It had been a lovely beginning to a lovely day.  Cozy.  Happy.    

And then they decided to go shopping.    

From the moment they left the protective bubble of their home the alpha became more and more stressed.  He became growly and prickly to be around.  The salesperson did her best to include both Dean and Cas in selecting furniture and storage options for their home.  But Cas either refused to engage or simply glowered at her.  Dean had tried all his best tricks to calm his alpha, to get them back to his earlier relaxed state, but nothing worked.  They ended up leaving the furniture store without purchasing anything, but with the salesperson's recommendation that maybe online shopping was a better option for them.  Dean was embarrassed, but he still gave Cas the benefit of the doubt, still kept his scent calm and tried his best to be comforting.     

But when the alpha started complaining about the food Dean had made them for dinner, he lost it.   

“Stop acting like a fucking knot head!” Dean growled. “If you don’t like my cooking, you can fucking do it yourself!”   

“Maybe I will!” Cas snapped back, then in the same moment seemed to regret his outburst, almost shrinking in size in front of Dean.   

Cas took great pride in not being a knot head and hearing his mate call him exactly that… Cas was ashamed.  Dean had known it was a low blow, but hell if he cared.  It took a few moments of silence, anger seeping steadily from the pregnant omega before the alpha talked again.   

“I am sorry Dean. The food… The food is fine.” Cas almost looked pained.  The omega part of Dean wanted to hug his alpha tightly, promise that everything was fine, to soothe, to comfort. But he was too mad to do that.  

“Yes, it is.” Was the cold reply. “And you have been acting like an asshole since your last meeting with Chuck.  What the hell is going on with you, Cas?”  

For a moment the alpha hesitated, looking at Dean sadly, like he wished he did not have to answer.  That his answer would be painful.   

“Gabriel.”   

“Gabriel?” Dean repeated, only a little confused. That explained Cas’ reaction on inviting their brothers over for lunch.  They had seemed alright at the baby shower, but now that Dean thought about it, Cas had kept his distance. Not enough for anyone to really notice as they had been so many, but enough for Dean to think about it afterwards.. 

“Yes.” Cas got up, started to pace the room as if his emotions overwhelmed him too much to keep still.  Dean's sensitive sense of smell picked up an intense mixture of anger, betrayal, hurt, fear. From his seat he watched the alpha pace, but he knew better than to interrupt. With Cas it seemed to work better to wait until he was ready to talk.   

“Father told me… He told me that Gabriel is the one who told him about you and the pups and everything. Dammit.  That he and Gabriel have been in contact for years. He _knew_ that Chuck was sick. Knew that Chuck had not just abandoned the family.  Gabriel knew how I felt. He saw it fucking firsthand. Why wouldn’t he tell me? Why would he keep something like that hidden from me? I just don’t get it!” Castiel started, sounding more hurt than angry. His eyes were on the floor.   

“I don’t even know if Chuck is to be believed. I don’t want to believe him. I don’t know what to do, Dean. If I should take the confrontation with Gabriel. If I should just pretend that everything is alright or ignore it. I don’t know how to feel. And I am so sorry that I have been snappy and bitchy to be around. This is not your fault and I should not have taken it out on you.”  

The alpha had stopped his pacing and now looked down to where Dean still sat, blue eyes asking for forgiveness.     

“Next time alpha talk to me about things like this. I get affected too, you know. No matter how much you try to hide your emotions from me, I can still feel and smell your stress.” Dean sighed. “I hate not knowing, Cas. Because I cannot help but wonder if you are unhappy with me.  No matter how much you assure me that you love me Cas, I still worry that you will one day realize I'm not good enough for you.”  

“God, no Dean.  Never.  You are perfect for me my omega," Cas stated, kneeling at Dean's feet and taking his hands.  "Just perfect.  If anything you are too good for me."   

"I am sorry Dean.  Please forgive me.” Cas sounded so broken as he rested his forehead in Dean's lap.   

“I know you are.  I forgive you.  I love you.” Dean said, leaning over his alpha in an awkward attempt at an embrace.  Having a stomach bigger than a watermelon made it difficult, but he managed.   

Dean could never stay mad at Cas, not really.  And it saddened him to realize how much his alpha had been suffering.  While Sam was still the master of sad puppy dog eyes, Cas could come in a close second.  Still maybe Dean could use his alpha's guilt for his behavior as a way to finally get those storage cabinets they had looked at while at the store today.  They had full-length mirrors on the doors.  Wonder what it would be like to have sex in front of them?  Stupid pregnancy hormones.  Dean shook his head to clear those inappropriate (at the time) thoughts and get his attention back on taking care of his alpha (non-sexually, stupid brain).   

“So what are you going to do about Gabe?”   

“I have to talk to him.  I want to know his side of the story. His reasons for doing what he did.” Cas sighed loudly.   

“Mhm.” Dean agreed. “What about eating dinner beforehand?”   

“Yeah. OK," Cas agreed, looking up at Dean with a soft smile.     

Over dinner, Cas talked and Dean listened, occasionally reaching out to squeeze his alpha's hand or simply place a comforting hand upon his knee.  Cas told Dean everything that happened, everything Chuck had said.  He share his fears.  His hopes.  Cas loved Gabriel, the beta had been his everything for years.  But he missed his father.  He wanted both of them in his life, but was worried he could lose both of them.  Chuck because of his illness.  And Gabe because of his lies.     

When Cas finally stopped talking, Dean did the only thing he could do.  He softly kissed his alpha and promised to always have his back no matter what happened.   

 

  

 


	12. Speak no evil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas finally talks with Gabriel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this chapter is living up to you expectations, because I gotta be honest and say, that it is the last one. At the least for a very long time. 
> 
> I know that the story cannot end this was, I know that I should give you some sort of "finish". I know this is not what you hoped for. And believe me, I really, really wished things where going differently. But facing the facts, having 2 jobs, husband and horse to care for on top of myself just takes away my time and my energy.   
> This has been great to work through my problems. You and your comments has really kept me going, so thank you, so, so much for all of your support.

No, Castiel did not want to confront Gabriel. To be honest he loathed the thought of doing it. But it had to be done. He had already pushed it for too long, putting his mind into renovations, Dean and the babies.  He had been able to pretend through the baby shower, or so he hoped, anyway. He had greeted Gabriel, hugged him and then pretty much avoided him for the rest of the evening. There had been enough guests he could talk to, so he doubted anyone had noticed.  

Cas feared the outcome. He feared that Gabriel would get mad or refuse to talk about it, because where did that leave him? He feared that Gabriel would deny everything and it would turn out that Chuck was lying, but he did not want that either. He had thought about it way too long.  

Even though Dean did not say anything, Cas knew that it was taking a toll on him as well. He slept badly, therefore Dean slept badly. His emotions could be hidden under a smile, but they affected his scent, so he could not hide anything from his mate. It was not good.  

Cas starred at his phone for several minutes before finally hitting the call-button.  

“Hello Gabriel.”   

_“Hey. What’s up?”_   

“I wonder if we could meet? I have some stuff I would like to talk with you about.” Castiel replied truthfully.   

_“Sure, sure. I am off early tomorrow. Do you want me to swing by or are you coming here_?” Gabriel sounded unworried.   

“I will come by.” Cas informed him and ended the call, breathing out heavily. He had no desire for this conversation what so ever, which was why he avoided it for so long.  

   

It was obvious Gabriel had no idea to why Castiel wanted to talk when he opened the door the following day.   If he did know, he hid it very well.   

Cas kept up the small talk while Gabriel made them coffee.  Cookies were inevitable when having coffee with Gabe and the alpha was more than happy to dive into the crisp yet soft sweet pieces of chocolate heaven.     

“So, is everything alright? You sounded so serious on the phone.” Gabriel asked, his eyes worried, his usual confident façade gone.   

For a moment, Cas did not reply. He sighed, eyes closed, as he wondered how to start.   

“As you know, I am currently talking with father…”   

“Yeah?”   

“… He said that you two have been in contact all this time. That you have kept him posted on how I was doing.” Cas knew his voice was shaking.  The only thing keeping his hands steady was his tight grip around the coffee-cup. And as the mental dam broke he found himself unable to hold back the his words.   

“He told me that you _knew_ he was sick. That you knew why he had left. You could have eased my suffering so many years ago, Gabriel. Why didn’t you? Why would you let me think that my father had _chosen to leave me?_ ” He was panting, his airway tight as if invisible hands were choking him, restricting his airflow.  

“He said that you have kept him updated on me. On my life! The life I had managed to build up without him! Do you have any idea what seeing him again does to me, Gabriel? Do you? I had just started to come to terms with not having my father in my life. Accepting that he simply did not care enough about me. Now I know that it is not the truth. That he maybe cared too fucking much, and I have no clue what to do with that.”  

With that said, Cas' anger seeped out if him like the gas out of a leaking balloon. Cas huddled on the chair, trying his best to catch his breath.  Anger had never been an emotion he was comfortable with and it never failed to leave him drained, upset and exhausted.   

Gabriel hesitated, looking uncomfortable.   

“I did know, yes.” Gabriel confirmed, then his look hardened. “But there are things you must understand, Cas… I was nowhere near ready to take on the responsibility of raising a kid when dad took off. No matter how much I loved you and cared for you, there is a huge difference between being a big brother and being a parent. I never asked for that, and I did what I felt was best at the time. You will never hear me apologize for trying to act in your best interest. Maybe I screwed up, but I did everything I could.”  

Cas opened his mouth to reply, but Gabriel shushed him.   

“I will try to make you understand. You were inconsolable when you showed up here.  You had lost your mother, your brother, and your father.  It took me months to get you settled to a point where you could sleep without waking up screaming, crying or begging for dad to come home. I worked my ass off supporting the both of us.  I sleepwalked through my days  because I was working two jobs and you kept me awake at night.  But I did so happily, because I loved you and I refused to be yet another person that left you.  I have no idea how often I called dad, but I called him a lot.  He never answered.  I left begging messages on his voicemail asking him to come home.  It was horrible and pathetic really, but I was a scared kid and I had no clue what I was doing raising you.  But then after about two years of nothing, dad's accountant called me.  An account had suddenly been set up for us and I had all the money I needed to cover our living expenses, more than we needed really.  I thought about telling dad to go fuck himself.  If it had just been about me, I would have refused the money outright.  But you needed therapy badly at the time. I had no clue how to help you deal with that on top of having to work two jobs.”  

Castiel remembered that all too vividly. The nightmares. How his mind ran off with him, how everything spiraled out of control. Fear had been a constant companion. It had been horrible. He was failing school because he could not concentrate.  He had no friends.  He was the weird kid whose dad had left him.  Kids talked about him behind his back.  Bullied him.  Teachers tried to help, but his needs were just too great for regular public school.  He worried constantly and picked at his fingers until they bled.  At home, when the phone rang he felt sure that it was someone calling to tell him that Gabriel had died too. When he woke up alone he saw nothing but dead faces in the darkness of the night. Ambulances going in the direction of their home sent him into panic attacks.   

Gabriel watched the emotions flicker over Castiel’s face as he remembered. Then he continued:  

“About a week after the account was set up, I got a call from Meg, dad's nurse. No explanations, no nothing, just her letting me know that dad was being admitted to a full time, closed psychiatric care facility, and that she had no idea when, or if, he would be out.  She stated that he simply asked that I continue to take care of you.  Part of me had always hoped that he would come back, you know? I thought he had left us for a model just like you did, when the first pictures showed up online. Up until Meg's phone call I had no idea he was sick. 

I couldn’t tell you Cas, not when I barely knew what was going on with dad myself.  Not when I had no idea if dad would ever be OK again.  I had no answers to the questions I knew you were going to ask.   Years passed with only a phone call or two from Meg keeping me updated on dad's progress, or more truthfully, his lack of progress.  What good would it have done for you to know? You were getting better.  You were in therapy and I got you into a small, private school catering to non traditional learners.  Your grades were up and you started to talk about your future. You had friends, you were happy.  You needed that stability.  I refused to uproot your peace with news about dad.      

Cas held himself back from interrupting Gabriel. He understood, even though he was mad that the decision was made for him, why Gabriel had not told him about dad when he was a teenager. But that did not explain why Gabriel had not talked to him about it later on.  When Gabe stopped talking, seemingly done with his explanation, Cas finally spoke. 

“So when dad started to get better, why didn’t you tell me then?  Why didn’t you tell me that he wanted back in my life?” His tone sounded bitter and accusatory even to his own ears.   

“I…” Gabriel stopped himself, starring at Cas like he might have the answer.   

“Why Gabriel?”  

“There were times he was suicidal.  At first I did not want to set you up to lose him again.  I thought I was protecting you.” Gabriel explained. “But I was afraid too.  It had been so long.  I had kept the secret for so long that I worried if you found out...” He shrugged helplessly.  

"I couldn’t lose you too, Cas. I am sorry, but I couldn’t. And by not seeing through my own fear, I hurt you.” Gabe sighed deeply, digging a hand through his hair. “Maybe I should have told you that we talked and that I kept him posted on how you were doing, but I could not see how that would make anything better for you, you know? He did not want any contact with you at that time.”  

“He didn’t?”  

“No. He had the same fears I did. He had no desire to reach out to you if he ended up getting worse again.  But it's been years since he had a suicidal episode.  He's stable and managing his illness well.  And Cassy, he truly does want a relationship with you. ”  

The beta sighed deeply, grabbing a cookie. “My coffee as gone cold – do you want another cup?”   

“Sure.” Cas agreed, thoughts whirling inside his head. The confrontation had turned out a lot better than anticipated. He had prepared himself for the worst, expecting Gabriel to deny everything or just yell at him. Instead he found that his brother’s reasoning made sense. He could see why Gabe had not told him about Chuck. 

   

Gabriel returned with two freshly steaming cups of hot coffee.   

“I never meant for Chuck to just call you or show up like he did. I had told him that I thought you were ready to get back in contact with him and I did suggest that I talked with you first, eased you into this.  I thought he had agreed to that. Heck, I got so mad when I learned that he had called you out of the blue like that. That was not how it was supposed to go. Never.” Mind obviously elsewhere Gabriel dipped a piece of cookie into the coffee. He barely noticed that it started to crumble, bits and pieces flowing around in the dark liquid. 

“I am sorry for how this turned out, Cas. I never meant to hurt you. I never meant for dad to do so either.”   

And Castiel knew that. Everything Gabriel had done, had ever done, had been with Castiel’s best interest in mind.   

“I am just so confused, Gabe.” He admitted. “I don’t know if I trust Chuck or if I want or need him back in my life. I mean… I have already have a family and my pups have a granddad.  I'm happy.  But Chuck used to be… he was so great, remember?  He was a great dad.  Attentive,  listening,  supportive, loving.  I want that dad in my life. In my pup’s life. I just don’t trust if he can be that again.”   

“What would you do?” Cas asked, starring into the dark liquid in his cup.  

“Isn’t that pretty obvious?” Gabriel asked. Cas could hear him smiling. The smile made his eyes soft and warm. “I chose to take him back. I have lost enough family.” 

“Do you trust him?”  

Gabriel considered that for a fair amount of time. “I do, yes. I trust that he has learned to manage his illness. I trust that he will withdraw and start more intensive treatment or whatever needed if he starts spiraling downward again." 

“It isn't an easy decision,"  Gabe continued, "Especially since it involves more than just you.  You have a mate, pups on the way.  You have to do what is best for you and your family.  I will support you no matter what decision you make Cas.  Please believe that.  But no matter what you decide, please know that Chuck left us because he believed he posed a danger to us and was trying to protect us.  I can't promise if he will ever be the dad you need again.  But he loves you.  Loves us.  And he never stopped.”    

As Cas sat on the sofa, now curled into the arms of his older brother, he realized that their conversation had not turned out how Cas had anticipated or feared.  Instead it gave him some clarity and some much needed answers.   He needed to talk to Dean.  He would need to make a support plan with Benny.  Learn more about bipolar disorder and how it was managed.   

But he had decided.  He wanted Chuck back in his life again. He wanted his pups to know their other grandfather.   

He wanted his dad back.  However he could have him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aprils fool! (I am at the least posting this april the first in my time zone :))
> 
> I am currently working on chapter 14 - so no worries, there will be more! :D


	13. Presents and promises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chuck is getting his spending-pants on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you are still with me, even though it has been a while. I hope to post the next chapter shortly (fingers crossed, my may is nuts). Both this and the next has been quite a litteral pain in my arse to write, hence the long wait. I am pretty sure my poor beta has been having an even harder time editing what I send her.

Looking into the mirror, Chuck was shocked to see how much he still looked like himself.  The years had been kind to him physically, but he still felt old.  His youngest child had grown from a quiet pre-teen to a man with a family of his own.   All of his boys were now grown men. But he felt that he looked pretty much the same. His hair was still curly and thick.  Maybe with a bit more grey, but it was still there and unruly as it had ever been. His skin had more wrinkles, most of them at his brow line due to worry, but there were no smile lines around his eyes or mouth.  Most people would simply write it off to good genes, but Chuck knew better.  He had rarely smiled over the past two decades, he had never had a reason to.  But he intended to change that.  Chuck had been given a second chance at life and he had reason to smile.  Smile big.  

Castiel had called him a fortnight ago. 

His youngest son had come to a decision and he wanted him.  Wanted Chuck back in his life and part of his family.  It had taken some time to sink in.  

After the call they had a meeting, him, Cas, Dean, Meg and the therapist Dean and Cas used, Benny. Always a planner, always organized, Cas wanted to discuss the best way to introduce Chuck into his family without causing stress especially on his pregnant omega.  He also wanted to know how to identify if Chuck was having a relapse, how to avoid triggers, and a plan to deal with any issues that may arise.  His kid was worried and with good reason.  Chuck had abandoned him once and could do it again.  Besides his son now had his own family to worry about.   

Chuck decided that he would agree to do anything his son wanted if it allowed him to be part of his life again.  He agreed to family counseling and to follow the plan that Meg and Benny set out for them.  And to always communicate his feelings, good or bad.  That seemed to ease Castiel quite a lot. They exchanged phone numbers too, so that Dean and Cas could contact Meg in case things went sour.  It was a rare thing now, his bipolar disorder getting the best of him, but it could happen. He had never acted out in public or been violent towards others.  Instead he directed all of his emotions inward and punished himself.  Or so he had thought.  He was just now understanding how much he had actually punished his son with his absence. 

To his surprise it was Dean who hugged him first as they left the meeting.  Or grabbed his shoulders and attempted to hug him, pregnant belly blocking the way.  It was their first real hug since meeting.  Cas had smiled warmly at the exchange and followed suit, “I am glad you are back in my life father.”  The formal title still made Chuck bristle internally, but he would take what he could get.  He had not earned back the privilege of being called Dad.   

The next two weeks seemed almost to good to be true.  But as the days passed and no “sorry, but I changed my mind” texts ticked in, he started truly believing he could have a family again.  Dean started texting him too, usually complaining good naturedly about his overprotective alpha son.  The way they had both started to include him on their regular day to day life, had welcomed him into their home, was emotionally overwhelming.  But in a good way.   It was  actually another text from Cas, one bemoaning all the supplies two small babies needed, that spurred him into action today.  

Now smiling at the reflection in the mirror, Chuck turned away and went to get dressed. 

 

Babies called for celebrations and gifts.  Chuck had not been invited to the baby shower, but he knew how to buy gifts.  Possibly enough to fill an entire room.  Biologically these were not his first grandkids.  Michael had children, but he was not allowed to contact them.  So in a way, Dean and Cas’ kids were his first grandkids and he was determined not to mess up.  Chuck felt pride swell in his chest as he almost jumped down the stairs to the parking lot. He was going to be a grandpa and hell if he wasn’t  going to be the most awesome one in the entire world. 

First mission: Spoil.  

It did not take long  to drive from the hotel and to the city. Chuck felt as if he was  driving on clouds of happiness. What would he get the pups? And their dads? So many options, so few limitations.  

Cas had talked about gardening. He had actually not talked, rather rambled like a lunatic when he had showed Chuck around their new home, yard included. And the older alpha had easily been able to imagine everything that Cas had planned.  The yard definitely had potential. Yeah, he could get his kid some seeds and a hose or whatever was still needed for that garden. 

The kitchen though.  Or as Cas stated, Dean’s domain.  The kitchen was ugly as fuck, but as Cas pointed out, fully functional.  They were waiting to redo the kitchen until after the birth of the twins, so Dean could do most of the work himself.  

Chuck briefly debated paying for a surprise kitchen remodel, but quickly decided against it. 

Dean, at least from what he learned and observed, was strong and independent, but could be prideful.  He was loyal and protective of those he loved and was absolutely the perfect mate for Cas. 

But he could not see Dean reacting well to another alpha getting in his space and trying to take over  So no kitchen remodeling, but maybe a food processor and some sterilization supplies?  He could imagine Dean using Cas’ garden vegetables and making homemade baby food for the pups.   Maybe some recipe books?  Bibs and some baby bowls and spoons? 

He would have to ask for advice at the store. 

The pups however were easy.  He knew exactly what to get for them.   Cas had loved reading-time when he was  a kid, and Chuck knew in his heart, that Cas’ pups would be readers too.  Reading had never failed to settle him when he had been upset or anxious.  According to Cas, the pups settled down and stopped kicking Dean’s insides when ever Cas told them a story.  Apparently, a love for reading was inherited.  So books it was.  And if he happened to add some other toys and baby clothes (sue him, those baby shoes were irresistible) to the cart, what did it matter?   

  

Shopping took longer than expected, but soon enough his purchases had been made, courtesy wrapped, and loaded into his car. Chuck’s happy determination began to fade though as he drove to Cas and Dean’s house, gifts stacked so high in the back seat he could not see  out the back window. Would they appreciate him just showing up?  Would they like the gifts?  Would they think it was too much?   Was it too much?? 

The impala was not in the driveway when he pulled to the front of the house.  No lights were on either.  No movement in windows.  Chuck brightened – this was perfect!  He would simply leave the gifts at the front door and leave.  That way Dean and Cas could open them privately and Cas could respond in his own way and time.   

It took him two walks to and from the car to get all the gifts to their front-door. Then he stood a little, looking at the pile. It was easy to spot from the road. What if someone decided to steal them? A thief would definitely be disappointed to find the biggest package, the one that resembled a box for a flat screen television, was actually a shrub trimmer. But it would still get stolen. 

Chuck frowned, locking his car remotely with his key. No, the gifts could not stay on the front porch, and throwing a blanket or something else over them would still be screaming to the neighborhood that something of value was hidden there. Which left him with two options: He could carry the gifts back to the car and come back later.  Or he could look for a spare key and leave the gifts inside.  Chuck’s insecurity made the decision for him.  He needed to get the gifts inside the house. 

Not surprisingly he found the spare key hidden in the backyard, underneath a flower pot decorated with bees.  It looked exactly like the flower pot they used to have years ago.  A fond smile spread across his face as he pushed open the door, balancing the first of the gifts in his arms.  Somethings change, but somethings stay the same. 

Chuck sighed happily when the last of the presents were placed on the kitchen table.  Something felt a little off, but he was also in his son’s house without permission.  Did he make a mistake in doing this? 

For a moment he simply considered the  mountain of presents he had placed on the table, breathing in the homey mix of scents belonging to his son and his pregnant omega.  Yeah, they would be so happy with the gifts, he felt sure of it.  Hopefully, the thought and love he had put into his gift choices would negate his breach of their personal space.  Just yesterday Cas had told him he was always welcome in his home. 

He was just about to leave when he picked up on what felt off. It was not his emotions.  No, something smelled wrong. Not in the trash-can-should-have-been-emptied-yesterday kind of wrong, but metallic and acidy and out of place wrong. 

Then it hit him.  

“DEAN?” He yelled.  The house was silent. 

The smell.  The smell was familiar.   

Omega in pain, his brain and instincts told him. Omega bleeding.  

Omega in labor.  

Where the hell was his son-in-law?  

“DEAN?” He tried again, walking from the kitchen, phone in his hand, ready to dial 911. 

Chuck moved further into the house, stopping and checking each room.  The acidy smell got stronger. He opened the door to the small bathroom. No Dean. The dining room.  Nada.  The living room. New curtains. No Dean. He almost forgot the small office behind the living room. Pushing open the door he was overwhelmed by the stench of blood. 

Dean was on the floor, curled into a tight ball.  Chuck was beside him in an instant.  He was breathing. Thank god.  

 _“911, what is your emergency?”_  

“Pregnant omega, he has fallen.  He is unconscious and bleeding. 38 weeks along.” Chuck informed the operator and giving her the address.  He took Dean’s hand, but did not dare to move him further. 

“Cas?” Dean rasped, looking at Chuck with unfocused and confused eyes.  

“No, but he will be at your side soon.” He promised before dialing his youngest child.  

The way the curtains hung unevenly, the ladder, told Chuck that Dean had tried hanging curtains himself. His late wife had nested with each pregnancy, nothing ever good enough for her babies, and he could only imagine Dean’s angst at bring unready.  From everything Cas had told him about his mate, Chuck knew he was independent and preferred to do the work with his own two hands. 

 _“_ _Father?”_ Cas answered warmly.  Chuck closed his eyes, took a deep breath and made himself speak. 

“Dean is hurt. Paramedics are  on their way. Meet us at the hospital.”  

 _“Is he alright?”_  

“No.” Chuck answered, wishing he had better news to tell his son. But the way Dean winced in pain at regular intervals, the way his entire scent was overwhelmed by the metallic stench of blood and acidy agony told him otherwise.  

Cas let out a pained whimper before ending the call not wasting time asking for details.  Chuck appreciated that.  There was nothing more he could say. 

Too slow for his liking the paramedics arrived. Too slowly for his liking they assessed Dean, got him ready for transport and into the ambulance.  

Chuck held Dean’s hand the entire drive.  Dean had grabbed him again as soon as the paramedics had him settled on a stretcher, probably because his scent reminded him of Castiel’s. Chuck was just happy he could offer any comfort, no matter how little. He could see how Dean’s face grimaced in pain, felt how his son-in-law squeezed his hand tighter with each passing contraction.  And they were getting more frequent.  Oh god, he just hoped Cas made it to the hospital in time. 

Multi tasking with his free hand, Chuck called Gabriel and asked him to go to the boys home, clean, and lock up.  No one needed to go home to blood on the floor especially if things ended badly.  Oh god, he did not want things to end badly.  He wanted so much to meet his grandchildren.  He could hear and see the paramedics reassessing Dean as they drove.  How had he hurt himself. His name and date of birth.  What year was it.  Where did it hurt. Dean’s answers grew clearer and more focused as they drove, but his contractions grew stronger and more painful and his blood pressure was dropping. 

Dean panicked when they arrived at the hospital and he was asked to let go of Chuck. He was lucid but scared out if his wits.  Chuck’s heart ached for him, but he understood the need to get Dean advanced care as soon as possible.   

“I will stay here, wait for Cas, okay?  We will see you as soon as possible kiddo.” He promised . Dean starred at him with wide green eyes, then nodded before letting go of his hand.  He was immediately whisked away behind the green, emergency room doors and Chuck was left standing alone in the now silent waiting room. 

He had barely had a moment to breath before he picked up the scent of his youngest son, now tainted with the bitter smell of worry. 

“Where is he Dad? Where is Dean? Is he okay? Is he hurt? What about the babies?” There was panic in Cas’ voice, words falling all over one another as he tried to ask his questions all at once.  

“They took him into the emergency room, behind those doors there.” He paused to gather his thoughts and remain calm for his son.  “Dean was conscious and seemed OK, but the babies, the babies were coming Cas.  Right now they are making sure that Dean and  the babies are alright.  They said they would update us as soon as they could.” 

He felt useless.  He could do nothing to ease his son’s pain. 

Suddenly Cas was in his arms, hugging him tight.  

Chuck did not understand.  

“Thank god that you came by Dad. Who knows… Fuck. What would have happened if you hadn’t…”  

Chuck simply held his now sobbing son close, offering what little peace he could, mumbling soothing words about Dean’s strength, how he would be fine.  After a few moments, breath hitching, Cas calmed. 

”Can you tell me what happened?” 

Before replying Chuck guided Cas into a waiting room chair and went to the vending machine for two cups of coffee.  It was going to be a long night, best start prepping now.   

“Dean had been trying to hang up curtains and fell.  I’m not sure when it happened.  He was unconscious when I first found him, but became lucid pretty quickly. The EMT’s did not seem to think he had major head trauma or had broken anything.” He hesitated for a moment. “He was bleeding though. And having contractions.”  

Cas tensed beside him, knuckles going white around his coffee cup. 

“Gabriel should be here soon. I called him from the ambulance.  I asked him lock up your house first.  I forgot to do that when we left.” 

“Think you were busy with more important things,” Castiel mumbled with a small, sad smile. “But I appreciate it.  I appreciate everything you did tonight.” 

 

It only later occurred to him that this was the day Castiel had finally started calling him Dad. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do not worry too much! I have made promises and I intend to keep them. :D


	14. Humans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean is not entirely happy with the situation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you may have noted, there is a limit to the amount of chapters. Next chapter is going to finish this part of the series. I will very most likely do timestamps. This is my "baby", my first finished piece of story, the novel-length I have posted. So if you have anything you just burn to hear more about, let me know. 
> 
> You have been wonderful readers, kept me motivated, kept me going. Thank you <3

Cas had been behind the counter at the shop when Chuck's caller ID lit up his screen.  He was surprised since Chuck knew he usually worked the morning hours to have the afternoons off with Dean. But given the fact school was out, mornings were quiet and he had more than enough time to talk.  Sighing he picked up the call.  

“Father?” Cas knew he sounded confused, but it was a weird time to call. Something felt off.  

 _“Dean is hurt. Paramedics on their way. Meet us at the hospital.”_ Chuck stated without preamble.  

“Is he alright?” Cas knew he was begging, but he knew better. Chuck calling already had his gut in a knot.  Something was wrong if Chuck was calling. Very, very wrong. 

 _“No.”_   

Whimpering he ended the call. Thank god Krissy, one of his experienced part-timers agreed to watch the shop until Charlie arrived, because Cas could not find it in himself to care if the place was left unlocked.  

Maybe he shouldn't be driving himself.  But he did not want to waste time waiting for a taxi or calling his brother for a ride. His mate was hurt. His children....his inside twisted again in pain.  His children he was not sure about.    

Castiel drove.  

It took too long for him to get to the hospital and find a parking spot.  He took a moment to lock up the impala, lovingly stroking his hand over the hood.  Dean would never forgive him if he left his baby unlocked and she was stolen...Dean.  _Dean._ Cas ran.  He crashed through the emergency room visitor entrance barely missing a young woman and her child.  He managed a clipped "cuse' me" before he was running past the visitor desk and towards green doors, ignoring the calls of the admissions staff.    

Where he had hoped to find his mate, he found his father, staring at the same green doors that had attracted his attention.  The scent remnants of Dean's pain clung to the older alpha.   

"Dad?" 

The hug was comforting.  The presence of his father even more so.  This was the man he remembered and in this moment Cas was happy Chuck was here.    

Cas stared into his cup of coffee and for the life of him could not remember how he got it.  Everything was a buzzing, confusing blur.  Time passed.  He had no clue how long before Gabriel showed up and he was within comforting arms once more.   

“You should call Sam.” Gabriel told him before hugging him again.  

Cas groaned.  He hadn't even thought about Sam.  Dean's little brother would kill him if he did not call.  Closing his eyes he let himself breathe for a moment before taking out his phone and dialing the youngest Winchester. He knew that Sam would have questions.  

 _“Hey Cas, what’s up?”_ Sam sounded happy.  

“Dean is in the hospital.” He replied.  He was reminded of a similar phone call not so long ago.  Cas thought he had been scared then, but it was mere anxiety compared to the terror he felt now.  

 _“What happened?”_  

“I… He fell, I think.” Chuck nodded confirming. “He fell. I wasn’t there. He is most likely in labor.”  

 _“Fuck. I will be there as soon as possible, okay?”_ It was so obvious that Sam tried to keep it together, but even over the phone his voice was panicked.  

“Yeah. I'm sure Dean would want you here.”  

 _“Thanks_ _Cas_ _. Carrier and child department, right?”_  

“Yeah.”  

Sam hung up before he could say more. Not that there was more to say anyway. It was not like he knew what was going on or he could reassure the beta with good news. So far he knew nothing.  

Cas looked down.  He still held the now cold coffee in his left hand.  

Chuck stood beside his chair, looking as helpless as he felt. “Would you mind getting me another cup of coffee, dad?”  

“No, of course not.” Chuck replied with a small smile.   

  

A dark haired female in scrubs came through the green doors, eyes searching and landing on Cas and his small party.  The gentle smile around her lips did not entirely make up for the worry in her eyes.  

“Mr. Novak?  Castiel Novak?"  

At Cas' confirmation, she presented her hand and stated, "I am  Dr. Braeden and I am in charge of Deans care.”  As they shook hands, she continued speaking, sensing the need for immediate reassurance.  “He is fine, Castiel. Your babies are too.”  

The breath that Cas did not realize he was holding came out in a gasp.  He realized he was crying.    

With a soft smile she followed him as Chuck guided him to sit back down, taking a seat beside him, an arm around his shoulder.  Gabriel sat on his other side, a united front, as Dr. Braeden took a seat across from them.  

“Dean told me he started having mild contractions in the morning hours before you left."  Seeing the distress on Cas' face, she continued on quickly, "Dean said you should not blame yourself.  He did not tell you because he thought they were false, Braxton-hicks contractions.  Something Donna had warned your both about." 

Cas nodded in agreement.  

“He told me that the contractions got worse as he worked around the house, but he wanted to finish hanging the curtains while you were at work.  Apparently, and I quote, ‘Cas would have done a horrible job with his ten thumbs’. 

Dr. Braeden shared a wry smile with Cas, she did not approve of Dean's choice of activity either.  No matter the reason.     

"As Dean was reaching up to hang the curtain rod, a very painful contraction hit.  So painful, he lost his balance and fell off the ladder.  We have ruled out a serious head injury and Dean has no broken bones.  We believe it was the pain and shock that caused him to lose consciousness."  

Dr. Braeden stood and Cas, Chuck, and Gabriel did as well.    

“I am going to bring you to Dean now.  He is in active labor, Castiel. We are monitoring both babies and Dean, but so far everything seems to be in order.  Your children are going to be born today.”  

 

As they walked through the green doors, leaving Chuck and Gabriel behind temporarily, Dr. Braeden warned him of what to expect.  “Because of all the monitoring we have him hooked up to an array of machines which can look scary. Currently he is in a delivery-room, but as everything progresses, we will move him into an operating room because he, strictly speaking, is a high-risk pregnancy carrying twins.”  

Cas nodded slowly, Donna had prepared them for birthing at the local hospital.  Things could go sour quickly and the doctors did not want to lose valuable time transporting Dean from the delivery room to an operating room rather than a delivery room.    

"It will be several hours more before Dean is ready to give birth.” She said, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder.  Dr. Braeden was an omega Cas noted for the first time, sniffing discreetly.  Her smell calmed him.  No pain clung to her.  Her scent was warm and conveyed honesty.  She genuinely believed Dean and their children would be alright.  

 “Okay.” He said with a small smile.  Cas knew he would ultimately have more questions, but at that moment he just really, really wanted to see his mate.   

 

Dr. Braeden was right.  At first glance the scene was overwhelming.  Dean looked small and pale, eyes closed, in the middle of his hospital bed.  He was surrounded by machines.  Two belts around his stomach, a clamp on his finger, blood pressure cuff around his arm, an IV fluid bag running into a needle in his left hand.  A part of Cas wanted to tear it all off, throw his mate over his shoulder, and run back to their den.  But he knew better, no matter how much his protective alpha side whined.   

Hesitantly, Cas moved closer to Dean's bedside, suddenly unsure of what to do.  Dean looked so breakable. 

“’m sorry, Cas.”  

Cas gently grabbed the hand without the IV, stroking his thumb over the back of Dean’s hand.  

“Don’t be. I should… I should have known. Shouldn’t have left you at home alone. Especially with ladders around.” What should have been a joke fell flat to the ground, leaving Cas with a forced smile and eyes stinging.  

“I…” Dean swallowed audibly. “It is not your fault. Stop taking the blame, stupid alpha.”  

“Well, you shouldn't be blamed either.  You were just getting our nest ready, sweet omega” Cas retorted, causing Dean to smile weakly his way. “I love you Dean. I am just glad that you and our babies are alright.”  

“Fuck.” Dean mumbled, his face and scent changing with the passing contraction.  How doctor Braeden had not smelled like pain Cas had no idea. His hand were squeezed painfully as Dean gasped for air. What maybe took a minute felt like hours as he held Dean's hand, unable to do anything but wince in sympathy with the passing contraction.  

“70 second contraction Dean.” Braeden commented, looking up from her watch. “5 minutes in between.”  

Then she looked at Cas. “Can you behave while I check out your partner’s privates or would you rather step out of the room?”  

“I can behave.”  

“Figured.” She smiled towards him.  

He had no trouble imagining why some alphas would not be comfortable with letting another person touch their omega so intimately.  Stirrups were raised from the end of the bed and Dean's feet and legs were placed into them leaving him fully exposed.  Dr. Braeden was quick and efficient though, limiting the uncomfortableness as much as possible.   

"You're at 4 centimeters Dean.  Only 6 more to go!"  

Dean groaned dramatically which earned a wide smile from Dr. Braeden.  

“I will check in on you later.” She promised.  Cas could only respond with a grimace as Dean tried to twist off his fingers as another contraction hit.  

  

Later was only thirty minutes, as Dr. Braeden returned escorting Chuck, Gabriel, and Sam with her. Gabriel had the hospital bag Cas and Dean had packed over his shoulder.  

Dean was lying on his left side, more comfortable but still panting after a hard contraction.  He looked at Cas than pointed towards the bag then his ears.  Cas nodded.   

"Come here baby brother."  Sam was quickly at Dean's side, covering him entirely as he leaned down for a hug.   

Cas pulled Chuck and Gabriel to the far side of the room, taking the bag from Gabriel and opening the small side pouch which contained Dean's ipod and earphones.  Dean had created some birthing playlists to help the time pass.  He also claimed that any Winchester-Novak baby should be greeted at birth by the sounds of Led Zepplin.  Cas smiled and looked back at his omega.   

Sam was now sitting up, wiping tears from his face with the back of his sleeve.  Dean was rubbing his arm and whispering something that had him smiling.  Cas realized suddenly that Sam had almost lost the most important person in his life today.  He shuddered at the thought of a world without Dean in it.  But that had not happened.  Instead Dean was safe and their babies were healthy and about to be born.       

Cas looked at Chuck.  "Dad, no matter what happens in the future, I will never ever forget what you did for Dean today.  Thank you for being there."  With that said, Cas hugged Chuck, grabbing Gabriel by the shoulder and pulling him in as well.  It was everything Cas longed for and never thought he could have again.  Chuck and Gabriel also seemed overwhelmed with emotion.  Gabe finally breaking the hug to smile and turn the attention back to Dean. 

"So Dean, I heard the it takes the average omega 86 hours of labor to birth a child, so you have what, 80, 82 hours left to go?  Oh wait is your birthing time doubled cause your having twins?"  

"Oh my god, why are you here?" Dean replied while throwing a pillow at Gabe and causing Sam to laugh.  Cas could recognize the attempt to lighten the mood and he sat in awe as his omega teased back and forth with Gabriel.  He could see Sam's shoulders relax with every sarcastic comment Dean made as he realized his brother really was going to be OK.   

Chuck, Sam, and Gabriel stayed a few hours more.  They helped Dean through a few contractions, Sam massaging Dean's lower back while Gabriel and Chuck told stories about Cas as a child to distract him from the pain.  Sam ducked out a few times to call Bobby and the rest of their family to keep them up to date on Dean's progress.  Soon it was clear that Dean's labor was going to be a lot longer and that Dean needed to rest in between contractions in order to be ready for the twin's birth.   After each man got a hug and assurance from Dean, Sam's hug lasting the longest, they left with the promise to return when, as Gabe put it, "Dean finally evicted those no rent paying babies."   

  

Braeden was not the only doctor checking up on Deans progress.  

When the water finally broke it was a beta male having a student or intern with him. The intern cleverly stayed back. 

Cas felt like crying half of the time, being unable to ease Deans pain in any way, until Dean snarled at him to get his hands on his back and start massaging. What had been showed as massages in birthing classes turned out to be Cas feeling as if he could push through Deans lower back with the pressure applied. He had no idea how Dean found comfort in it, but where more than happy to provide with whatever he could.  

The contractions grew closer, the breaks in between not really there anymore.  

More doctors. More dilation. He was glad that it was doctor Braeden having her hands inside Dean and not some stranger. At the point where she declared him 8 cm open (why couldn’t doctors use inches like normal persons?) and almost there he was ready to bite whoever tried touching his mate. His hands where hurting from the so called massaging.  

They were moved to the operating room, doctors refusing to let Dean do anything but being in pain until getting there. He had been recommended an epidural which he had refused with all the stubbornness he could manage. Being Dean, even in labor, that where a fucking lot.  

He lost sense of time, lost in the trying-to-ease-pain, the smell of bodily fluids, of hearing Dean gasping his way through more and more contractions with shorter and shorter span in between. Dean where strong and beautiful in a twisted way as he were crying out in agony as another contraction made his knees buckle and Cas pretty much had to catch him (why the hell had he insisted on standing up? Why?). His body knew what it where doing, and Dean just took it like a man. Shaking and shivering aside. Cas had read somewhere that giving birth where like getting all bones in the body broken simultaneously or something.  

He tried telling Dean how proud he was. “You are so brave baby.”  

Dean snarled at him that he needed to go to the bathroom fucking bad. Doctor Braeden refused to let him, telling him that it was the baby pressing against his rectum and giving the illusion that he had too. Dean threatened to shit on the table which did not seem to affect the doctor in the least. 

Cas could not really see the magic in that. 

“10!” Braeden declared like it was a magic number after another check on Dean’s dilation. “You feel like pushing?”  

When the other doctors in their scrubs had entered the room Castiel would never be able to answer. He felt safe, knowing that they were ready if things went wrong. Especially with the first push where Dean turned from a slightly sweaty-red to dangerously pink.  

“Hold back.” Braeden instructed, earning herself a deathly glare from Dean until the next contraction hit where he where allowed to push again.  

Cas could just watch his mates face turn into various shades of red, deeper and darker with each push, bringing their babies closer to the world. He could not have felt more helpless, letting Dean do all the work. Trying to praise him seemed to earn him the same glare that Braeden had gotten, so he decided not to.  

More pushing.  

Dean were told to hold back with pushing, allowing his muscles and tissue to stretch with the baby. Cas could almost feel the relief radiating from him when he where allowed to push again.  

Out came the first baby, vailing unhappily. The entire room smelled like blood, pain, sweat and bodily fluids that Cas did not feel like dwelling too long upon. Someone took their child, wrapping him or her up in a fluffy towel to get the baby cleaned off. Cas starred after them.  

“Baby B is doing fine.” A voice to his left told him. Braeden were hand deep in his mate.  

“Head is down. Your contractions should come back any minute now.”  

And they did indeed.  

Out came the second pup, seemingly so fast compared to how much time Dean had spent in pain with the first one.  

Birthing the placentas were messy. Cas were more than happy to tare his gaze from the bloody liver-looking mass and onto the child someone placed in his arms. The blue hat the gender clear. A similar shape with a pink hat was placed in Deans arms, even though he almost looked too tired to hold them up himself. Well, that settled that part. Not identical.  

“Hello, Babyboy.” Cas whispered, moving closer to Dean, letting the sounds from doctors cleaning up blood and tissue and gore be what it was.  

Braeden looked smugly at them. 24 hours earlier it had just been him and Dean. Now they were a family of four. How fucking amazing where that? His vision where blurry. He could feel Dean placing a hand on his shoulder.  

“Look at how tiny they are.” His green eyed mate whispered with a voice raw from emotion.  

"They smell like family." Was all Cas managed. 

"Yeah." Dean agreed. 

 


	15. Miles and Eden

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean and Castiel finally brings home their children

15 Home again  

Dean had, sort of, expected that the hard work would end once he squeezed the babies out of him.  

That was not the case. Things that he had been sure would just fucking work, had not worked. He had read the books and done his research (yes Cas, I did read all those books like you asked) about what to expect after giving birth.  How babies don't sleep through the night, how twins might have trouble syncing up their sleep rhythms, how much babies cried for no fathomable reason, how breast-feeding was a bitch with two pups and pretty painful, how two small pups could produce so much poop.  Part of him had just skimmed through the chapters on post-birth issues, figuring that it would not be an issue with  _his_  kids. It was.  

Somehow, Dean had also managed to overlook the part about recovery time.  A month at least of his body recovering from blood loss, tearing tissue, organs retracting to a somewhat normal size.  Of his privates healing up again after the massive trauma of pushing out too watermelons. Okay, to be fair, the babies had not exactly been watermelon size, maybe more large grapefruits.  But the absolute pain and exhaustion that came with birthing two pups?  No matter how smitten and in love Cas looked while looking at their pups, if there were to be any siblings, Cas could damn well carry them. It seemed fair.  

The pups were diapered on their way home from the hospital and so was Dean.  At least that was what wearing the so-called carrier-pads for post-birth bleeding felt like.  He was glad that he wasn't female and had to worry about accidently peeing himself due to muscle looseness - until he remembered that he had to deal with the other thing.   Number two.  It had been painful and the sitz baths provided minimal relief but at least kept the area clean.  Castiel learned not to rush into the bathroom each time Dean sounded pained.  No matter how much he wanted to, their were certain things – private things - his alpha could not help him with.    

And his body.  He used to have a nice body.  A body that was his and not a feeding machine for two hungry, yet adorable pups.  Dean sighed and rubbed his belly.  His previously round, taunt pregnant belly.  Now empty, stretched, too soft skin hanging down his no longer muscled stomach.  Stretchmarks crisscrossed his tummy, breasts, and hips.  His birthing canal was swollen and stitched.  His breasts engorged like two cow udders.  He looked so very unsexy that he had no idea how Cas did not run away in disgust each time he undressed.  But no, his alpha looked just as smitten with him as he did with his pups and took time each night to rub cocoa butter onto his stretchmarks.  Dean wasn't sure it would help, but it sure did feel good.   

But  dammit it was all worth it.  

The not sleeping, the constant worry, the pain, the bleeding, the everything.  Dean had not thought himself capable of so much love. But he was.  He felt like he was overflowing in it.  He and Cas would be sitting on their front porch, coffee in their hands, absolutely silent because the pups had just settled to sleep in their impala strollers after a morning walk – and Dean would look at Cas and Cas would look back and Dean would think, "I have absolutely everything I could possibly want."  And his heart would feel like it exploded.   

Cas.  Cas and his pups. 

For awhile, too long if you asked Sam, the pups were just that the pups.  The pups surname they had agreed on, Winchester-Novak, from pretty much day one, but it turned out that naming kids was a lot harder then they had been led to believe. There had been a lot of discussion about names during Dean's pregnancy. They had browsed books and magazines, page after page of baby names, and online baby-name-generators.  They got other family member opinions and suggestions.   

Dean had thought about naming one of their kids after his mom Mary, but it felt wrong given the suffering her life and death ultimately caused him and Sammy.  Almost like the name might be cursed.  Castiel had wanted more religious names since it was a Novak family tradition.  But Dean had outright said no to that.     

Plus, he ultimately wanted the names to represent who his pups were – not someone dead or in the bible.    

They ended up bringing their pups home from the hospital without naming them.  Donna had suggested getting to know their children first.  Donna's sister had decided on a name during pregnancy, but when the baby came out the gentle name did not fit her strong willed, temperamental niece.   

"The perfect name is the one which fits the pup's personality best.  Take your time and the names will come." Donna advised.   

Donna had been right.  

Their baby boy would fall asleep almost instantly in any moving vehicle - car, stroller, on top of the washing machine.  If it moved, he slept.  When Cas described the phenomenon to Charlie, she said something about the pup not being able to sleep without "the miles moving by".  Dean had laughed when Cas told him about it, but it stuck.  Miles.  Miles was the name of their boy pup. 

“It is kind of our own personal garden of Eden out here.” Dean had one night said, admiring Cas as he worked in the garden.  His girl pup was in his arms as he spoke, one of her chubby hands in her mouth, little legs kicking.   At Dean's declaration, she stopped moving and looked at him with such seriousness that Dean felt she was trying to tell him something.  Most likely she was just fascinated by something in the sky or surprised by his voice, but it felt like something more.  Eden.  Eden was the name of their girl pup.  Cas had been thrilled.  

  

“I can’t believe that Jess is pregnant.” Cas leaned back, cradling Eden in his arms. He loved holding the pups whenever he could, even if it just meant them sleeping in his arms.  

“No. It is awesome. Our kids are going to be so close.” He agreed, rocking the stroller with Miles in it absentmindedly. “Did she seem like she had lost weight to you too?”  

Cas nodded in agreement.  

“Morning sickness can be a bitch.” Dean sighed. He knew that Sam was thrilled about the pregnancy. He had barely been able to keep himself together long enough to announce it, even though worry had been in his scent as well.  Dean understood.  He had been father to Sam growing up and now a father for real.  It was the toughest job ever.  But also the most fulfilling.  Sam would be an awesome dad.  He could not wish for more for his baby brother.  

They had been spending a lot of time with family since the pups birth.  Castiel started spending more time with Chuck and Gabriel took his role as uncle (the best uncle ever) very seriously.  Bobby came over for dinner every Friday and Dean got misty eyed watching him interact with the pups.  Weekend family barbeques became the norm and Dean insisted on doing the grilling.  Every weekend the house seemed to be filled with family and Dean found that he loved it.  The pups were surrounded by love and quite spoiled.  Jody turned out to be a master gardener and spent hours discussing landscaping with Cas.  She would also bring her two teenage daughters with her when she visited and Dean already had plans to utilize them as babysitters in the future.  The very distant future.  Sam and Jessica were frequent guests as well. She still looked sick, but had that radiant glow about her anyway.  Dean wondered if he had looked like that while pregnant too. Happy. Content.   Still, he made sure to plan weekly coffee (decaf for her of course) dates with her and Charlie.  Dean knew Sammy was taking care of Jess, but somethings you could only talk about with other omegas.  Dean knew that from experience.    

Chuck turned out to have an amazing amount of knowledge about babies.  He pointed out that he had been the one to stay at home with the pups while his wife returned to work.  It was surprisingly non-traditional for the Novak family, but a decision he never regretted.  The older man where too serious in his attempt to get back with his family. He informed them when he had his bad periods (so far, that had been one), let Meg contact them during and keep them informed. Heck, he had even agreed to go with Cas for a few therapy-sessions, getting their problems sorted through.  

Gabriel joined them. There were still a lot of things they needed to sort out, but overall, things between them got better. Sometimes Dean had wondered if Cas where too forgiving for his own good, but seeing how easy his interactions with his family became, how happy it made him, he understood. Sometimes he wished that he had gotten the option of talking things through with John.  

Things got sorted through with Cas and his family. Dean knew far from everything they talked about, but he was okay with that. As long as Castiel where happy, he did not care.  

  

Things were going well, and Dean where happy. For the life of him, he could not remember ever feeling so content with the life he had. Maybe he was the typical stereotypical omega with kids and a house, but seeing his alpha on his knees, tending to the potatoes, he did not really feel like it. Cas could still barely heat up a pizza, but Dean did not mind cooking. The guys in the garage where more than happy to let him bring the kids to work occasionally, even though not very much got done those days. Especially self-proclaimed “uncle Garth” where fond of playing and entertaining the twins. Bobby seemed to be more than fine with letting him, having a lot of quality time with them when he visited Dean and Cas.  

For once he had gotten to a point where he felt as if he had earned his happiness. Things were going well. Jessica complained about being pregnant in the heat, so whenever she was visiting, Dean fed her smoothies and ice-cream, being very able to sympathize with how she felt. She had gained weight again as the morning sickness had subsided, looking as healthy as a pregnant woman should.  

  

He could not wish for more.  

  

THE END.  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for your love and support for this story. I know that some things are still left out there in the open, that not all have been wrapped up nicely. 
> 
> I am sorry that it took me this long to post this last chapter. Part of me haven't wanted to do so, finishing up this piece of my first real fanfic is wierdly ambivalent for me. Part of me want to continue this until they die, but I have said what I wanted to say. I never intended for this to be a kidfic either, but for Dean to have his happy ending, to defy what he had been taught he didn't deserve, it took that turn.   
> I had never expected to actually finish this, to deal with what I have dealt with through writing this. Maybe one day I will be ready to deal with the grief-parts, but I wasn't, not for this. 
> 
> I do plan on doing some oneshots with decent amount of fluff out somewhere in the future.   
> I do plan on finishing the Sabriel focused piece.   
> I do also plan on doing a please!verse explanation on the biological stuff, in case any of you like the way I have made things work or just would like my thoughts on how A/B/O could work, from a biological point of view.   
> When do I plan this?  
> Oh shoot, when life give me the option. Right now I am working on my harlequinn challenge and tropefest too, so keep your eyes out for that if you like my writing. 
> 
> Thank you so much again for all your love and support. This would never have been without you readers questioning me, wondering and leaving your love, just like it would never have been without my wonderful beta. One of her first emails to me contained words I have kept in my mind "please do not use the healing dick. Dean needs help!" And help he got, even though I personally think he would have prefered a good fuck to solve his problems. 
> 
> If there is anything you feel I have left out, anything where you lack an explanation or something, let me know. I may write it in a one-shot later one, at the least I will do my very best to explain the intentions and thoughts the characters had in the moment. It is not always that I know everything, you see, or understand all that they do. 
> 
> Again, thank you so, so much. This journey have been wonderful and thoughtful and everything I could have hoped for. 
> 
> <3 Deancebra


End file.
